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Everything posted by mar

  1. FallingApart Your journal idea sounds great. I think I will start one for ds! If I could explain to him why I put him on his diet and why I yell at times bc 10 warnings aren't enought. If he only new that I live my life around him and only do things to help him. I now he bows somewhat. But during those times when he is being to rough with dd and I yell and I know he is not doing it on purpose are those times that kill me. I hate when I yell about something he can't control at times. There is so much I could say and i always fear that he will hate me for something when I spent all these years trying to help him. Just to say its not his fault for behaving a certain way and I sk understand. I want him to know he was not alone. I was always looking over whatever he suffered from and praying he would get pasted it. Being in the same room with kids seems to get me when they aren't doing well. I feel like I need to break away. When they are doing better I enjoy being around them. All day when they are ag school I miss them. When ds gets home I watch and I know how the book back is thrown and in the first five minutes how the day will go. He has a hard time starting on homework and it's start this do this and I hate doing this but if I don't I fear he won't get anything done. I hope that he will appreciate all my nagging that got him through school rather then say my mom was mean. This journal might help me feel better. Like earlier today he got dd to Agree to go out in front and tackle each other with helmets on I say " no" ! He saids we will wear jackets to stay warm and have helmets. He will crush her in first 5 min. No way!! Mar
  2. I am so so sorry to hear about all that you are dealing with!!!! You Are a very strong mother and j will keep you in my prays and pray that god stays by you and keeps you strong. Mar
  3. Oh my j totally feel like I have PTSD! For the past three years August just freaks me out with the start of school. This is when all this hit back then so I get really stressed out during this time. When other parents can't wait for their kids to go back I stress. I have twenty things going through my head . I hope and pray they don't get sick and if they do will I have to go through what I did have to go through three years ago. I am stronger now and know a lot more but that fear is there. Something always goes crazy when school starts and I hate it. I wish summer could last for ever!!! Mar
  4. You will be in my prayers tonight. You do need time for yourself which I know is hard when you have a child that needs you. I truly believe that you need to throw them into the situation without turning back and no guilt. I know my dd was younger at the time but it started in kindergarten where all of a sudden does not want to go to school and crying screaming and all crazy. Got her back but had to drive one way with tears and was stuck driving because I gave in. Ifirst grade got upset about something on bus and did not want to take it or go to a school. Drive her all year to make her happy. She would not pick out clothes in morning, crying and all. This year we have her pick out clothes night before and she has tried the will you pick me up and I say no bc of ds schedule. I say no absolutely not bc it's impossible where truely it is. But being tough and leaving no choice has helped her greatly. Dd is definetly milder then your child but she was and Is the my way or the highway attitude but If she has no choice and I show no pity and stall rough and strong she has gotten better. I defiantly think that she knew where to push my buttons and I was always at her side but now it's I will ignore her and tell her to be strong and she must see that I am serious. In the beginning it hurt me bc I am not kntk that tough love but it has helped her tk be stronger and depend on herself.. J will give all hugs and kisses but during the morning or when needed I'm like the drill Sargon and over time this is what she needs. Mar
  5. So me and ds ard talking today on the way to dance and somehow we get on topic of Christmas and new years. So he said when is Christmas and is it on the same day each year? I was like seriously you dont know what day Christmas is on and he didn't. He says i dong really thing about the day and its on different days each year but who does not know this. then we talk about new year And I ask him when is new year and he seems confused. I say dec 31 and he says jan 1 and then says maybe middle of jan. I am like when do we always celebrate and he is not sure! He knows or new this why does he seem so confused. I think at 10 years old you know the 25 and 31 for new year. The way he was talking he is not himself. So then call DH to tell him I am doing holloween party at ds school at no one will be at dd school for her parade and he says when is Halloween??? I am like the 31st!!! Okay what day is it on he says?? Okay I am sorry but after ds conversation and then this it annoys me. What is up with this. Mar
  6. Yes I see this at home a lot. If ds makes a loud sound or noise dd will start at times and it becomes a loud game. I ask for them tk stop and eat and it's a struggle. And ds who is older has told me he can't control it at times and when dd starts up his eyes widen and he is happy to let it all out. Yes it's a mad house around here at times and I have to intervene at times and send them upstairs until they calm down. The funny thing is they will do it ag hind but be fine at other people's houses during dinnet because they hold it in. Sometimes I feel like they love to drive me crazy!!! But j know they cant control it at times and once they get started I am doomed until I ask dozens of times and have to seperate them. I know being at home and being able to let things out is good for them. I guess I am able to tolerate it to a point but it drives DH crazy. He thinks they have no respect and don't listen but I know it's not on purpose and once I seperate them and give them a chance to calm down things are better. When I have one at home it's fine but when they get together it's a different story!! Mar
  7. Where can I order those hamster balls?? Like no joke I have though about that several times:) I swear when school starts my aniexty goes off like a time bomb bc I'm always like how will this year go with strep!!!!! Thank god this year is going okay with dd bc I had my share in kindergarten and 1st grade where I had to pull her out of car and that didn't work and basically had to go to I will be arrested!!!! Those times it was always something silly she freaked out about! It was only a couple weeks of craziness but totally stressful !!!! you wake up and just don't know how it's going to go all smiley and fake just to make sure you can get out the door without a breakdown!! It's interesting but I have noticed my child's handwriting go from good to what the ?? Is going on. Like I said bring those hamster balls!! Mar
  8. This is sk interesting and confusing at the same time! It's crazy how school starts and notice ds reacting more with some tics and what not but anyway we tested him for strep a couple weeks ago and was negative but shows mild signs of OCDand of tics. Anyway I remember years ago when they were younger and before I new all this I would take ds in because of fever and he had strep. I would have them test dd with no symptoms bc I was there and she would be positive. On many occasions ds would show symptoms and be positive but dd with no symptoms ( meaning fever) would be positive and treated. Now looking back these past couple of years dd is showing high fevers with strep. Both of them have had negative results so I am assuming that aren't carriers. There were times when dd was positive and ds was not. And when he had the test several weeks ago I was surprised he wasn't positive bc I have been seeing other symptoms other then sickness and sad to say ( not that I wish my child to have strep) he was negative. So from what you have posted if seems that they are not carriers. I am interested in step in the sinuse? Do doctors actually swab them in there nose for strep? When ds was so bad three years ago and was negative by throat but crazy allergies and congestion I wonder if he had it in sinuses? So I am assuming if DH and i don't swap positive at times we are not carriers. It's just crazy how one of my brothers kids never had strep and then the other brother had a daughter with eczema and food allergies and recall when she was 4 she had strep with no symptoms and she kept testing positive and they were thinking to get tonsils out but was given stronger antibiotic and she was negative and no surgery. Never had strep that they know of again.. They thought she might be a carrier. This is the freaky part dd sleeps over several years later and remember her coming home and crying that night saying she feels real sad and doesn't know why. It took her about a week to get back to normal. Her and her cousin are inseparable. Then on another sleepover I recall my sister in law calling at 8 in the morning saying that she wants to come home! This is so unlike her especially when she waits all day for this. She has been fine lately but always wonder with those couple of times where it was such a drastic change in her. Now my crazy thinking of maybe my niece was still a carrier? Who will ever know??? Mar
  9. I agree with evemac mom. My ds had sensitivities to 28 out of 80 foods. It started with some outdoor allergies to full blown diet bc I was not satisfied with the out door allergies. Got him tested for sensitivities and life for him took a different course. I now I have said this many a times but he was miserable, congested, sneezing like crazy and pale with bags under eyes! He is better with allergies bc of food diet and has not taken Any allergy meds in three years bc of his food diet. He was bad in the beginning with recommendations of ashma outdoor allergies year long. Mar
  10. Want to mention I will never forget that one time ds was about 5 and had a fever for one day low grade ( he always would get high grade with anything) and it went away and then a couple of days later congestion hit with a fever and bring him in and has strep and so does dd and I was mad that I blew it off a couple of days prior. Will never forget that now of maybe I messed him up when I was always at doctor prior right away. Mar
  11. Thanks for the feedback! No I would never bring this up to the mother and I would never expect them treat their kids on my behalf. What you said is absolutely right. I am just trying to figure out what a carrier looks like and how it could affect the family. My kids seem to get fevers and throat pain but wonder about DH and me. What is interesting Is that a carrier could bring this home with no symptoms and get others infected. So DH has questioned himself but if a carrier does not get positive on strep rapid Nor on the culture how do you know they are a carrier? Obviously my kids show signs but could there be times they are not showing obvious signs of fever and sore throat and be carriers? I always assumed that carriers need to be treated but that does not seem to be the case. So what if DH or I are a carrier? Does being a carrier not affect the individual? I am just trying to get as much info as I can about strep and carriers. I just recall several years ago before vacation ds had strep and we all got tested and were fine. Could we be fine on strep tests and be carriers? Mar
  12. I know I probably have read this before but just want to confirm. When you are a carrier you obviously show no symptoms right? . So if you get a rapid swab and it's negative are you not a carrier? Does a carrier show positive rapid swabs. So if my child shows negative rapid swabs and is negative after culture they are not carriers. The reason I ask this question I guess is for my knowledge and also wonder about neighbors children. We met new neighbors last spring and my kids where hit with strep hard in April/may. Over the past couple of years they did great with one getting it once in 7 months and the other not infected. So after there bad hit this past may with it going back and forth b/t them and them playing with neighbors kids I am starting to wonder. So then the neighbors son had stomach pain and ear infection and some throat which she saids he gets everytime he's sick but for the first time he got swabbed for strep and he was positive. He is 10 and I can't believe they never ever swabbed before. This was about a month ago if not more. Then three weeks after that I meet up with her and she saids her sons throat is bothering him again and mother in law is telling her to get strep tested and she is all flustered saying I don't think that strep test was right he might only be a carrier and there is nothing I could do if that is tnd case. My eyeballs nearly popped out. I was thinking holy crap could he be a carrier that could be causing my kids issues and if he is, is this mom thinking its no big deal!! Well let me give you a background. This child has some autism and add and has a real low immune system. They are real nice people but bc her son is always sick with colds sore throats and ear infections and is always on antibiotics for something she just doesn't see this as a big deal. But for me it is a real eye opener. If this child is a carrier it greatly affects my children when they are around him. So I am trying to figure out how I tell this mom that you need to treat the carrier! Am I crazy but just bc a child is a carrier do you just let him be bc he has no fever. I am wondering if this would help her child out with always being sick if she cleared the strep. He is sick a lot and i feel bad for him. I wonder how many people out their say oh well he is just a carrier and I can't do nothing about it. I now wonder and worry if the strep could be coming from them! I guess that was more then one question. Mar
  13. So this past week week dd son has this new tic of having to check his belly button. He saids that if it bleeds he could die. I point to mine and touch it and he has some issues. I tell hom it's ok and that nothing will happen. Throughout the weak he said it fells wet. Like maybe it could be blood. I continue to say now way. During this time he knows and believes me but says mom it's one of those things I can't stop. The sad part is he's okay with it meaning it's not freaking him out I guess and he tells me and looks at me with those eyes saying I can't stop. I ask what if you don't look and he says then I have to bend forward which j have seen him do. So I definetly know this a tic and a new one that I have never seen. We have spoke about it and how silly it is with him not bleeding to death but he can't stop. So he got tested for strep several weeks ago and was fine. There has to be something causing this! He seems so strong yet I am freaking out!! Mar
  14. Yes this is my fear also! So this year, a couple of weeks ago at 10 1/2 he tells dd lets go and do christmas list and she says no bc it's Halloween. So he has not said anything.So I feel like I will give him this year but by next year he will be in junior high and I will have to tell him if he still believes b/c I dont want him to be picked on. I believe from how he is that he will be shocked and not believe me! I have been waiting for this and it's not happening for him so I know it will be rough. When he finds out it will be crazy for him. I know he will dwell on it and over think it and tons of questions were as any other kid would be fine and go about their day. So I will give him 1 more Christmas but have to mention something by next year if he still believes! Mar
  15. Here's a little about what we experienced with food sensitivities. Before we changed diet, my son was experiencing a number of tics, which, in retrospect, I now attribute to a probable genetic predisposition that was exacerbated by poor gut health brought on by poor diet (even though we though we had a pretty healthy diet!). Since his tic condition problably caught our attention only after it was exacerbated by years of deteriorating gut health that went unnoticed, improvement has been associated, in my non-expert mind, with improved gut health, which has taken time. So some tic improvements may take time. Nonetheless, once we decided to take long term steps (diet modification and supplements) and really focus on food triggers, we found ourselves picking up on foods that were offenders pretty easily. That is, his normal or "baseline" ticcing got noticeably worse fairly shortly after consuming a trigger food. This would tell us what to eliminate from his diet, and would also quite often land him in a bath of epsom salt, which has always been pretty effective at bringing tics back down to his baseline level. Slowly but sureley, his tics have become less and less, due, again in my non-expert opinion, to gut health which has improved slowly but surely, and a few key supplements. Now, when we allow him (ocassionally) to have foods that were once triggers, he tolerates them with no noticeable tic increase. But we are still vigilant and still restrict what he eats. One anecdote I have concerns one of the last truly noticeable differences in his level of ticcing. After a good year or so of the new diet, we were all at a comfortable spot with the improvements we had noticed. But we were still working. One day, I noticed my son's tics increase after eating an orange. Should have picked up on that before, I guess. It just so happened that I was giving him his multivitamin (one of the most notieceably beneficial supplements we use) in orange juice every morning. Stopped that the very next day, and within a week we saw a very noticeable decrease in tics. Hope this info helps answer your question. - Chris this is very interesting! Just 4 days ago it hit me bc ds Was all of a sudden having the lip tic with red lips that were causing pain and he was having mangerins alot which he does not typically have. I wasn't sure if it was due to cold weather but then two days ago I tell DH that he stopped having them and lips are better! The weather is still cold but he has not had the fruit so am assuming it might have something to do with that. Yes sensitivities can be tricky and do play a role on several occasions if too much are given. I have and do find a correlation with foods and tics. It's kind of hit or miss. I mean he knows what he is sensitive to but if he goes overboard then we see the effects. Mar
  16. Sous anyone know any ENT doctors in Illinois that are familiar with pandas? Mar
  17. We also tried magnesium calm and he hated the taste so that didn't last long. We did the Epsom salt baths with he liked and I thing are good. But I still believe to get further testing for food and all outdoor allergies. Also I agree with Chemar about getting rid of MSG and all dyes. We do no dyes and preservatives as much as we can. How old is your child and has he ever had strep throat? Mar
  18. Thank u so much for the reply. I think his grades and just school in general is causing his axiety. I have to keep reminding him to get started on homework but it's always I'm hungry ( which is fine I make sure he eats ). And he is getting a couple of c's this year which he has never had before and he asks me will u be made and is it bad If I get a c? The thing is I tell him it's not bad but if you are not studying and not putting effort into the subject then u should nt be satisfied with that. I am trying to teach him study habbits and to let him know that getting a C is not bad but if don't study and try then you shouldn't be proud of that. So yes me stepping back this year and letting him handle things and his grades are suffering is causes him stress. But I really need him to learn that it's his responsibility and not mine. I told him I am their if he needs help with understanding something or anything of that nature but he is in charge. He has been bringing his reading book home and is trying. The sad part is I want to take over and hope his stress goes down but I can't! He needs to figure this out on his own without moms help. So he has a bad quarter which I'm not worried about as long as he learns how to improve himself. Just kids now a days in general need to learn and realize that mom can't take care of everything. They need to realize that sometimes you fall down but it's ok wipe your knees and get back up. He was dependent on me for so many years I just want him to realize that he could do it on his own with some work. Yes it's harder on him bc he has the stress of tics and allergies and axiety and OCD but if he is always looking to me as he gets older that is not good for him. Don't get me wrong I am still here but this year it's more of what do u have to do and what do u think u need help with and could u do better. It's no longer well u need to do this and you need this signed and let me pack up your things and put it in book pack . He is a strong kid and I think he could do it. He has shown great results with different issues when I left it in his hands. Like when he was younger he always depended on me picking out his clothes and he would stress about it. I said you could handle it and wear whatever you like. Yes it was several months of mismatched and really should I sent him to school like this but he would ask is this okay and I said if that's what u want to wear then it looks good. Two years later he is helping dd what to wear bc she was going through the same thing. I think we as parents need to step back some times which is very hard when you see your child struggling and of course it depends on the situation. We all know our children and know what they can handle. Now his lips are bad and DH is doing full blown mouth tics bc of the redness. We use aquaphor and he is okay with it and puts it around his lips. I am interested in the LypSyl? Where do you purchase it? I am looking to throw something in his bookbag for school. It's sad bc I was downloading some iTunes games for him and as I looked at him he did his eye rolling and lips and he saids I'm sorry! I can't stop. I tell him never be sorry. He says I can't stop and I grab him and hug him and say I know And I understand. He looks at me and just nuzzles his head by me and wants that big hug!! At these times he always just wants to hug and he says u dont understand how much i love u. I tell him I understand and it's ok. Now the tears are flowing bc he is apologizing to me out of all people for something he can't control. The tears are flowing now of course and not in front of him. This is why I know these kids are strong.!! They amaze me with all they have to deal with. But it's really sad that they feel like they are doing something wrong!! Mar
  19. Ds lips are causing much pain. I had him do the chamomile tea bag on lips to sooth. This is very ironic . This is the first time I had to do this since he was 7. He has been using aquaphor also. anyway we are in basement and tell him to go get pajamas on and he fears to go upstairs. Doesn't show it but I know from his questions and stalling. Goes finally and acts Like he went through ww2. He admits he was scared of who knows what. I feel Like a broken record but what the heck. He just got tested for strep . He is scared but tries not to show it, his lips are killing him and he is just all over. This is actually his first semester of doing horrible in some grades. I am not watching everything he does and kind of left everything up to him and he is struggling in many areas. I have not been really paying attention to hw and what not and leaving him to figure it out. Meaning this is what you have but more Like what do you have to do today and show me and are you sure this is all u have. I will ask to make sure he does what needs to be done. He is somewhat disorganized this year. Forgot to turn in assignment and did not do well on several tests. I think that maybe I am not as involved bc I want him to see him handle it. So don't know if his stress is do to this or what!!
  20. Wow! Last year ds prepared his list advance and will sit and look through books and actually will think about prices bc Santa usually spends so much. You guys just made me realize how crazy this is. We watched elf when he was 8! And he make paper chains for his room and decorated the whole ceiling on his own. I'm talking hours of work!!! there was one year can't recall if the past one or prior where he found a box of their presents and I had to reward each one!! A couple of days later I find a letter in the garbage saying I don't think you real and what not and I showed him and asked if he had any questions and said he was silly bc he started to not believe but there is no way I would buy him all that so he believes! At the end of christmas last year he started making a list for this year! I said seriously! And he stopped! I though about him finding out and am fearful how it will affect him. He has been dealing with things for several years and sadly I don't recall how he was prior. I think my mind is fried with to much info. Mar
  21. Not sure If this wil help but dd would get red circle around her butt. It always seemed to happen when she would have orange juice or oranges. It would hurt and burn. When she stopped having them it went away. She is okay with oranges now. Mar
  22. I completely agree on eliminating tk see if it helps. We actually got our son the igg Elisa sensitivity test for about 88 different types of food and he came sensitive to 28 of them. We started an elimination diet on all of these and now know which ones are the worst offenders. Mar
  23. Nicklemama what type of treatment did you do for pandas? Mar
  24. I have never and will never give flu vaccine. I think all these shots are making our kids worse. Mar
  25. Thanks for All the replys. I cried myself to sleep last night which is something j haven't done in awhile. If just kills me how things could change so quickly. He goes to football with perfect lips and comes home 2 hours later with red lips and moving them nonstop. it really hurts so deep inside because I feel like I always can help with every bruise, cut need of a hug or a shoulder to lean on. But with the tics and seeing the look in his eyes makes me want to scream because I feel so helpless!! And I could only image what he feels and is going through. It's not fair for these kids!! Mar
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