I need help...

[Frazer]

The h*ll that is a life with TS gets deeper with age...some parents get it right from the beginning.... others mess up drastically. Kids are a product of their environment...if you let them grow up confused and jump in to screw them over out of nowhere you need to be ready. I have TS.... I have been an emotional mess my whole life. I can't figure out what is going on...I am completely lost. Where did they lose me? From the minute my brother was born.... some say I am jealous...I say they favored him and didn't step in where it was needed. Example...since I was a young kid I wanted to play Ice hockey like my friends...they never allowed me this as it was to dangerous. Why would you let me play football? Then they let my brother play.... When I wanted to again after giving up for over 2 years they said no that was his territory. If that is so why was he playing football in grade 9? That was my turf. They abandoned me when they forced me to move out of their home with the cover of "it being my choice” Like h*ll it was my choice it's just a cover so they wouldn’t feel guilty for forcing their own son who isn’t ready to move out. My brother has brought a dog into the house while my parents where on vacation; unregistered unlocked firearms are in the house. He has a dead car in the driveway... None of this earns him a hard time. My brother is living the natural way...earning the stuff me needs to move out first.... like a car and all that stuff I cannot afford while living on my own. My life was stressed even more when my mom came to my home and used all this as a ploy to get me to show her stuff I wasn’t ready too. Threatening to turn everything off that was in their name. All to see my messed up blogs and confused communications trying to figure out who I really am...She said she was trying to help and that she loved me and all that crap. Forcing me to expose stuff to her that I wasn’t ready to admit to myself wasn’t cool. She had seen it anyway. Why did she need me to show her this stuff?

 

Now I am a mess. I am more confrontational, more stressed, more confused, more lost than ever.

I don't know where to turn where to go to get help.... I am completely lost.... I’m scared of what I'll do to myself what I will become. Does anyone know of anything that can help someone in Canada...with TS lost and confused, scared, lonely and depressed?

 

 

Thanks

[faith]

Hi Frazer,

sorry you are not feeling so good today. Your previous posts were always so positive--what happened? Sometimes when we have a setback in any area of our lives, everything looks bleak. Tomorrow is another day, and I know you will get back on track.

 

Please forgive me for saying this, but I am thinking that when you say "life with TS is h*ll", I bet the TS is not really the main contributor for what you are feeling. Beleive me, life is littered with stumbling blocks for ALL of us, and I am with you on the downer feelings they bring. But I can tell you have something to offer, and you yourself have mentioned how you have overcome the TS and hardly have any tics and have a good job, better relationship with your family.......maybe its good that your are beginning to explore your inner feelings with your mom, maybe its a good step if you can get through it. But if she or anyone else is making you feel down, then maybe it would be good to just avoid them for a time until you are ready to deal with them.

 

Have you ever thought of getting involved with kids with TS, like at a camp or something like that where you could be a role model or mentor? -- I bet you'd be awesome at that. I think Carolyn may know something of this, maybe she could advise you how to get started in your area.

 

Lastly, if you can't seem to figure it all out for now, and you are really tapped for help, you could always ask for help from God......if you have a church you could vist, maybe you could just sit down and think of what to say....or say nothing......you might just discover the spiritual side of yourself and that could be a great start....you never know where He will lead you......

 

Hang in there friend,

 

Blessings,

Faith

[CarolynN]

Frazer,

 

I can only imagine the pain you are experiencing right now. It sounds like you are in a lot. But I can tell you know matter what you are going through there is absolute HOPE. I have had obessive compulsive disorder since I was a child and my son who is 7 has tourettes. I understand it is no picnic. However, there is one place I have found peace and hope. You can look many directions for answers, believe me I tried, and you will never experience that peace and hope until you have a relationship with God.

 

I read Faith's post and she is so right in asking God for answers. I am a Christian and have been since 1993. I gave my life over to Christ then. You may ask how do you do this? I did it by accepting I am a sinner (we all are sinners. The Bible makes this very clear) and I needed Him to rescue me from my sin. Christ paid the price for us 2,000 years ago on the cross and He rose from the dead proving He was God. It is simply accepting Him as your Lord and Savior and allowing him to rescue you.

 

I can tell you my life has never been the same since. Believe me I still struggle. Life is not perfect here on earth for anyone Christian or not Christian. But I have hope and peace know that I had never had before.

 

I am involved in a great Christian church and in a Bible study. The Bible study is where I really took off in my understanding. I would suggest if you have a Bible to read the book of John in the the New Testament (not to be confused with John 1, John 2, or John 3). It is a great place to start.

 

Frazer ask God to reveal Himself to you and ask Him to show you the truth. I know He will. He is faithful.

 

I will be praying for you!

 

Carolyn

[John]

Hang on in there Frazer

 

As we say over here

 

dont let the b***ards get you down.

 

You have plenty of friends here. Live your life as best you can and dont worry about anyone else.

[Pamela Kay]

Frazer

 

Hang in there things will get better.

 

I also wanted to add that I have three older brothers. Two of which my parents totally baby. One is an alcoholic and the other is a high functioning autistic. They still have to grow up at the ages of 38 and 44. Maybe your parents are not spoiling you as much as your brother but take a step back. Prove to them that you can make it without there help. I think you can. You found a great board with lots of support here. Sure it will be harder to acquire new things but this will make you stronger in the future.

 

Pam

[Frazer]

Thanks for all your advice everyone.... To tell the truth I am not sure about God.... I have found references of Christmas and Easter for example that predate Christianity...I don't know what to believe in this regard.... I have set up a appointment to see my doctor, I got some advice in a yahoo group that sounds like me...I may have Pyrrol disorder I have found out it's common among people with TS and ADHD.

I feel very lost right now.... I don't know where to turn...I don't feel I can trust my parents.... I feel violated by how they treat me and then my brother could make their home a wh*re house and get away with it. I mean if I had a car sitting in their driveway I would have them pressuring me to get it running, insured and licensed.... I brought a set of chefs knives home when I was working as a cook and they flipped out...My brother brings unregistered firearms in the house and only one has a trigger lock on it.... and he keeps the key right in it.

My heart is heavy right now...I feel so lost...alone and fearful I will never make any friends...the ones I do have I cannot meet up with...I mean I can find friends online but really its not the same as someone to go watch a football game with...I just feel like I need someone to hold...someone other than my family to love me.... I just feel like I have no one.

 

Frazer

[amy1]

Frazer:

"I will not leave you comfortless, I wil come to you"-John 14:18

 

It sounds as though you are in alot of pain and you are feeling so alone. Unfortunately we can't pick our parents or any other members of our family! We all have issues in our lives. This can make you be stronger. You can rise above it. I would urge you to find a church of your choice. Find one and ask about some groups. Many churches are there to offer you support. This may be a group or just talking to a minister or priest. I was raised in a family of alcoholics and was left alone during my childhood. Without going to a church and getting help i would've felt so alone and scared. God loves you and wants to help you. Ask Him---have faith even though you have questions. I have met so many friends at my church. I rely on church to keep me going. Try it...and remember you are not alone. I am praying for you today.

[CarolynN]

Hi Frazer,

 

I appreciate your upfrontness about God. I understand you have some questions about God's existence. A lot of people do. For the past 14 years of my life I have been studying the proof behind God's existence.

 

The good news is there is so much evidence to prove He is indeed real. It certainly does not take blind faith to believe in God or the Bible. I wanted to share with you just some of the facinating facts of God's existence and the Bible.

 

1. Jesus fulfilled over 300 Biblical prophecies written over 400 years before His birth. The odds of one person fulfilling just 48 of these equals a 1 with 157 zeros after it!

 

2. Job, in the Bible, wrote 3000 years ago, obviously long before technology that could have told him, “the earth is suspended over nothing”. He also states the constellation Pleiades “is bound together”. Meaning the stars are gravitationally clustered. Astronomers today now know this to be true with our current technology. How could he have known this without God’s insight at this point of history?

 

3. Many people believe the Bible refers to the earth being flat. However, Isaiah wrote 2700 years ago in the Bible, “God sits above the CIRCLE of the earth”. Not one place does the Bible refer to the earth being flat even though at that time in history people were unsure of how the Earth was shaped.

 

4. Thallus, a secular historian, meaning he had nothing to do with the Bible, in A.D. 52, documented the Mediterranean went dark and a great earthquake occurred at the time the Bible says Jesus was crucified. This verifies what the Bible states.

 

5. Jesus’ disciples ran for their lives before Jesus was crucified. Thereafter, they were willing to go to their own torturous deaths to spread the news of Jesus’ resurrection and His saving grace. Why would they die like this for a man still dead?

 

6. The book of Genesis refers to God forming Adam from the dust of the earth. Researchers at NASA’s Ames Research Center found every element of man to be in soil.

 

Frazer, there is a great book by a man who was an atheist and was out to prove the Bible wrong. He was a journalist and had a background in law. His name is Lee Strobel. After a lot of investigation he became a Christian because of the overwhelming facts surrounding who Christ is and the Bible's accuracy. It is called "The Case for Christ". As a matter of fact, a gentleman who I have known since high school, 20 years ago, was an atheist. After he read this book it completely changed his perspective and his life. Also there is a book by Josh McDowell called "More Than a Carpenter" showing the accuracy of Christ.

 

There is a great website put together by a man who independently studied evidences of the Bible. It is http://www.bibleevidences.com/ .

 

Frazer I don't know if there is a Christian church in your area but there is also a man named Bob George that I have listened to many times, on the radio, who has a website at http://www.realanswers.net/ . I just thought that might be a place you could go to listen and read some great information.

 

Frazer, I am sharing all this with you for one reason only. God made each and every one of us to have a relationship with Him. When we don't have that relationship, no matter what the circumstances of our lives might be, we will always be searching for something to fill that void. Only He can fill it!

 

I will be praying for you Frazer and for your family.

 

Carolyn

[Chemar]

Dear Frazer

 

I really do feel for what you are going through and want to encourage you that you are not alone.....I know so many people with TS and associated stuff that have suffered needlessly because of family and society dumping more on them than the load they already have to carry

 

Frazer, have you got any local support groups or anyone else you can see. It isnt good for you to have all this bottled up and churning around inside of you

 

perhaps a TSA group in your area? You can check from the TSA website at http://www.tsa-usa.org

 

also

 

a website you may benefit from is Life's A Twitch http://www.lifesatwitch.com

 

Dr Dunc (Duncan McKinley) is a psychologist who has TS himself and he has a really honest way of addressing stuff like you are going through...he also replies to emails

 

I hope things may take a brighter turn for you Frazer. I have certainly seen from your previous posts how motivated and encouraging you are, so I sure hope you will focus on your talents and abilities and use those to inspire you and at the same time help others

I know for my son, when the "blahs" of having TS/OCD etc come, he finds using his musical and artistic talents to be uplifting, but most of all he finds giving of himself to others who are suffering to be by far the best "medicine"...it changes his focus completely

 

hoping and praying for a positive turnaround for you too, Frazer

Cheri

[Calicat]

Hi Frazer,

Nothing to do with TS, but since this thread has taken a spiritual turn...

I know so well what it is like to struggle with doubt. I finally found a sense of peace in reading Brian Maclaren's "A New Kind of Christian". It offered perspectives that finally helped me make sense of the million questions floating around in my brain. It does not give definitive answers, but does offer ways of exploring some of those concepts you may struggle with. If it strikes a chord with you, there are two more books in the trilogy that were equally important to me--"The Story We Find Ourselves In" and "The Last Word and the Word After That". Hope this helps you as it has helped me.

Calicat