Feeling tired & overwhelmed!

[patty]

I am just overwhelmed with all the food avoidance, home cooking, trying new receipes, keeping the house clean & dustfree, researching, reading various books, finding doctors, and tracking my son's progress. I find myself exhausted & stressed out by the end of the day. I don't have much contact with my immediate family & friend like i used to, simply I don't have time or just too tired to pick up the phone. Luckily, I do have a couple of good friends who i see few times a week and are my biggest supportors.

 

The most stressful thing for me is to try something new because my son seems to react to everything. When we were on homepathic medicine and supplements, my son had more tics than before the treatment. I can't help but to second guess myself if I am doing the right thing. Unfortunately, the doctors don't really know either, since everyone response differently. Luckily, when all the homepathic medicine & supplement stop, along with chiropractic it seems to help with his tics. He is doing alot better than when he first started. Some of the tics have changed and some of the tics have stayed but it is infrequent.

 

Part of me want to stop everything and just let my son be, hoping that everything will work itself out. On the other hand, i know that i need to continue and go as far as i can. All i want is for my son to be happy, healthy & have quality of life.

 

Since my son's tic, i am on an emotional coaster. I am dealing with it better now because my son is doing much better. It gives me hope & strength to move forward, but i still slip once in awhile.

 

With the holiday coming up. Just the thought of buying x'mas gifts stresses me out. I am already at the rim, any more demand on myself will just push me over the edge. I so much want to be positive and energetic. Most days i am pretty good at hiding my stress, until night time when my kids are asleep. That's when i become deflated & immobilized. I am trying to reprogram myself to think different, to think more positively and stop projecting into the worse case senario, and it is semi-working.

 

Thanks for letting me vent. And joining this forum has allowed me to destress by having a connection with people who are in similar situations.

 

Patty

[Cum Passus]

Patty,

 

I know exactly how you feel. It is so hard to think about anything else, much less on the holidays. I have had the same thoughts about letting everything go. My husband is a big support, but since he had TS as a kid he really does think we should not do too much. He thinks it makes our son think about it too much. He also does believe there are things that will help that he did not have as a child. So it feels like a very fine line to walk.

 

I have found one blessing through all this. Spending Thanksgiving with family I found for the first time I was really and truly not interested in the family gossip. It was a great feeling. I pray for a healing everyday for our son, but sometimes I really believe the Lord is healing me first. C.P.

 

I read this poem by Helen Steiner Rice

 

NEVER BE DISCOURAGED

 

There is really nothing we need know or even try to understand

If we refuse to be discouraged and trust in God"s guiding hand.

 

So take heart and meet each minute with faith in God's great love,

Aware that every day of life is controlled by God above...

 

And never dread tomorrow or what the future brings,

Just pray for strengh and courage and trust God in all things.

 

And never grow discouraged be patient and just wait

For "God never comes too early and He never comes too late!"

[Sydsmom]

What a great poem. It hasn't been by my strength that I'm able to do all this, but by God's. The other blessing is that it has caused me to become a better mom. I wasn't a bad mom before but since all this have found myself becoming more patient and more involved with both of my kids. We started the diet and supplements 2 years ago and now Sydnie is 12 and she still tics but they are not very noticeable. We've relaxed a bit on some things and she sees a difference now when she eats wrong choices and I see her making good decisions on her own. Yeah!! It's a process and it does seem to get a little easier because it becomes the norm. Hang in there and cry out to the Lord for strength and wisdom.

 

Lisa

[Chemar]

((((Patty))))

 

i sure do feel for you cos I have been there too...as I think most of us have

 

honestly, for me and for my son, the truly liberating aspect in all this was when we decided some years back, that, whereas there were most certainly important things for us to do because it definitely helped to make his tics and OCD less intense, yet....we also accepted the fact that he has genetically inherited Tourette Syndrome and that people with TS tic. Period.

 

It doesnt mean we gave up on everything to help reduce the intensity and frequency of his tics...quite the opposite......he became an active partner in making the right choices re diet etc ............but we stopped being fanatical about it, and I stopped focussing so intensely on his every move and sound, which in itself helped him tremendously!

 

It released him to simply be his wonderful lovable self, tics and all, and it helped me to prioritise on what was important and what was not.

 

We both destressed enormously from that point on and doing the good stuff that helps became easier too because it was no longer a burden but a boon.

 

Like my friend Lara says..........people with TS tic, and it's ok!

 

Thanks for posting that poem CP.........I know it will bless all who read it:)

 

ps here again is the link to Lara's thread "It's OK to Tic" ....when she originally posted it on another forum about 5 years ago, it really helped me get things in focus!!

http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/showthread.php?t=1486

[Claire]

Hi Patty,

 

Sometimes I just had to take a break from the research and new recipes (internet and books).

 

I just worked with what I had for a while. Then came back when I was refreshed.

 

For me, some epiphany of relaxation came when I realized that when my son had setbacks, they were only temporary. So each 'setback' no longer meant that all the hard work I did was a waste of time and had no impact.

 

I let go of Christmas gift buying...for better or worse. I do much much less than I used to do. I did not want to deal with long lines. I also bought much more via the internet!

 

Good luck and give yourself a great big pat on the back, then get some big hugs from the kids!

 

Claire

[Giselle]

I wish I could give you a hug! I totally know how you feel. The learning curve on all of this could kill a horse! But it does get easier. And I agree setbacks are the WORST! My son is going through one of the worst periods he has ever had. It just sucks sometimes but. . . I think having had three years of ups and downs I know that it will pass - something is going on in his little body and it WILL pass (I actually think it's his teeth - he's getting a new one soon). You are doing an amazing job, you're being so progressive and strong. I agree, perhaps sit tight on what you know so that you can recoop, when you feel better look up something new, until then rotate the different recipes with the easy stuff (for us that's brown rice, steak, a steamed veggy and a salad - he seems to never get bored with that). As to presents- everyone will understand and appreciate gift cards - one stop shop at someplace like Target. Little little kids still like presents but I see my son and his friends squeal with glee when they get a Toys 'R Us gift card - they love spending their own money. And take some extra B12! That is such a stress buster for me - I even found some gumlet B12 by Solgar - tastes awesome. I don't know where you live but try to get a little sun light - winter bogs people down. I know when I'm blue I go sit outside or take a short walk and soak up some light - it really seems to help . I hope you feel less overwhelmed tomorrow and that each day gets better and better and easier and easier - keep it up girlfriend, you're doing great!

 

Giselle

[patty]

Thank you CP, Sydsmom, Chemar, Claire & Gieselle for your emotional support and sharing your experience with me. It is hard for me to share my feelings openly even with my closest family members because no one really understand how i am feeling or what we are doing. The alternative treatments that we are doing is just too overwhelming for most people to comprehend. As with my friends, a small part of me is afraid of their unacceptance of my child. A friend of mine actually made an insensitive comment to me about my son's symptoms. I was so devastated, i broke out in tears as soon as she left. Luckily, i was with a good friend of mine who tried to diffuse the situation. I am trying to be stronger emotionally to take on any unexpected events that may come my way.

 

C.P., that is a lovely poem. I will post that on my bulletin board as a daily reminder. I couldn't have come this far without my faith in God. He has lead me to the various doctors and this forum. Everyday I pray for wisdom, faith, strength and recovery for my son and myself. I know that if i am ok with whatever happens to him, he will be ok too. Together we will find a way and make it work.

 

Chemar and Claire, as alway, not only are you informative but you keep me grounded. Thx for the link. It is just what i needed to hear.

 

Sysmom, i feel the same way you do. As the result of my son's acute onset of tics, i have become a better mom & person. It has changed my perspective on so many levels. If my son's tics were mild, it would not have affected me the way it did. I have reexamined the way i see my son, how to raise my children, and myself. Not to say i wasn't a good mom, but there were things about my son that i didn't understand and now i do. I believe everything happened for a reason, and we learn from it and try to make things better.

 

Giselle, thanks for the B12 tip. You are an amazing person. In the midst of choas, you still managed to stay positive and give good advise. I hope you will find something that works for your son. My heart goes out to you. And you are right, this will also past. But i know it is hard in the mean time. And i am sure it is hardest on your son. Your son is very fortunate that he has a group of friends that support him. It is so crucial to have a safety net. With good family & friends behind him, he will be ok.

 

Patty