homeschoolers --help

[smartyjones]

ds9 is 2 months into treatment for multiple infections. we've seen some good results -- no more getting up to pee in middle of night, close to cessation of "bad thoughts" at bedtime, no more complaints of upset stomach, no more ankle pain complaints.

 

i believe this is somehow related as a negative -- i've spoken with dr, he's not worried, just thinks something in the process--did give us something that may help. but i need some advice/ideas for coping. his attention level is horrible. previous, he's been probably an average young boy that can get distracted, but not really to abnormal levels. now, it's really ridiculous.

 

he can now really only focus on reading. which i do realize is good he can at least do that. however, yesterday was troublesome as i was trying to get him to do some work. ds6, pandas, only needs a sliver to get him distracted, so i've got both of them doing basically nothing. we just had our conference -- our state requires proof of 'regular instruction' --of which, we had plenty. we'd have none from the past week or two.

 

i realize it's really more my coping problem than his. yesterday was much arguing. once he finally got into a task, he did really enjoy it. today was ice-skating in the am. they are now out playing football. he's done much reading but i haven't asked for anything else.

 

he's bright -- just qualified for a young talented program from a local college. perhaps that's adding to my stress that i feel i am failing him.

 

should i just allow him to read all day? should we just plan some field trips? do i push him to get started b/c he does get into it when he finally does --( but it is at a price)?

[eljomom]

Smarty-

 

We do NOT live in a state that requires "proof"--so I don't really know what that means....honestly, I get done in a few hours what gets done in a couple DAYS in public school, so do you have to show the same number of HOURS of work? If not, then one of the benefits you DO have from homeschooling, is adapting it to what works for YOUR life. If that means you do an intensive reading unit for a month, then when he's ready, focus on math for a month....or whatever works, right? To me, homeschooling means you get to decide HOW you go about getting your kids where they need to be. In our state, we get to decide the "where" part too, for the most part (yes, we do have to do a standardized test), but the how and when is up to us.

 

I'm guessing your son is in 3rd or 4th grade.....I wouldn't stress over the science, history, etc....stuff. Reading, some writing and 'rithmetic. We struggle with the inattention here too with dd7...it really makes me crazy sometimes. If she's over the top, I do let her do some things that she LIKES to do, like even do some math on the computer. Other days, I get more firm with her (sometimes to no avail, but sometimes it works...) and she will finally settle in for a bit. I had to switch a few things I was doing TOTALLY, as they were just not working for an inattentive kid.

 

Sorry if this doesn't help at all....I still feel like a total failure as a homeschooling parent...and I think that thinking about PANDAS 24/7 makes me a bit ADD myself!

[GraceUnderPressure]

I have one child who is hyper distracted & two who are low key, spacey kind of distracted. They all do better when I limit external distractions as much as possible & I try to give them their work in small chunks broken up by something that gets them physically moving.

 

My hyper ds likes to bounce on a mini-trampoline or run up & down the stairs (my slightly dyslexic dd did much better learning her multiplication tables by skip counting while she was bouncing). My two spacey guys are much more difficult to keep on task. Sometimes letting them time themselves helps - like how much time it takes to get a set of math problems done.

 

I read a book - think it was called "Smart Moves" - that talked about research & studies showing that our brains learn better when we move. Ironic that the traditional school set up is to have them sit still and to take away recess when they don't get their work done! That would explain why some other techniques for helping hyper kids stay in their place - like giving them a bouncy cusion on their seat or a large ball to sit on - work so well.

[Ozimum]

Hi,

An issue for my ds was an inability to focus/concentrate and he had that spaced out look, and was easily overloaded by any distraction. If you haven't tried it, perhaps a GF/CF diet would help? Apologies if you've already gone this route...it's just that it has really helped my ds - I'd never have believed it had I not seen it!

Edited March 8, 2011 by Ozimum

[Doug]

We are going to try to do homeschooling next year for my dd she will be in first grade should be in second but we have had to pull her out so many times because of her PANDAS

So now we are on our ivig #2 and I am just going to do for first grade and see how it goes

she needs time to heal and public school is just not the place

I hope I can do it but I think I have found a good one

it is called k12 online? is anyone elce on this one?It would sure be nice to have someone to talk to about it.

I think as long as they are getting some school it is better then pulling them in and out all of time.

She loves school and she is very good at school and she is NOT happy about homeschooling but she understands that this is what we need to do for now.

And I pray that when I do put her back into public school again that it wont start ALL over again.

Tracie

[Phasmid]

I homeschooled one year. What I found essential for my son is he HAD to go do something very athletic before sitting down to focus. He ran, rode his bike hard, and came home exhausted and ready to work.

[mkur]

I thought about homeschooling my son several years ago. I read about this method called spaced learning. I use it with my other son for studing. He bounces a basketball to destress. You can google it for more info. Baylor did a study about chewing gum and math. I also read that if your child learnings sometime and then goes to bed, his brain will reinforce the info during sleep.

 

Good luck

[momaine]

I have always homeschooled my two children in a VERY relaxed fashion. Really, we've just followed their interests and I have acted as a fascilitator to help them learn about the world. I introduce them to things, ie. books, games, places, and things, and help them explore the things that interest them.

 

My dd with PANDAS decided to try high school this year (first school experience) and took two classes first semester and is taking one second semester. Despite PANDAS issues, she fit right in and no one was the wiser for our years of really just having fun and learning as a side effect of living an interesting life.

 

I would recommend you enjoy your time with your child and not worry so much. They are already suffering so much and it is just adding to the stress to stress about school issues. What qualifies as "education" varies widely from classroom to classroom and you don't have to copy what they do at school in a large classroom to expose your child to educational things. Give him the gift of time and attention. The rest will happen naturally.

[momaine]

And I meant to mention that you can likely find a teacher to sign off on your paperwork that has a more relaxed educational philosophy, if you ask around. Other homeschool families in your state who believe in natural learning could probably point you in the right direction.

[LaraM]

I read an awesome book called "The Minds of Boys, Saving Our Sons from Falling Behind in School and Life" by Michael Gurian. It really has impacted the way I work with my ds7 and ds6. Your son is totally doing what comes natural to boys--immersing themselves in one topic (reading) for long periods of time. The author even did brain research and showed images of the male brain at rest vs. the female brain at rest (way less activity in the male brain at rest, whereas the female brain was still firing away because as it was explained in the book--girls are more apt to multi-task). The big things I came away from regarding that book, most "traditional learning" as we see in schools today is set up for the female brain...taking several subjects in the course of a day (the multi-tasking element), whereas boys like to focus in-depth on one thing to completion. The other thing, activity is key for boys. They need to move around A LOT and exercise prior to learning and throughout the day. They also need periods of downtime. I honestly know I am not doing it justice, but I would say reading it will make you feel better about your child's learning style.

[gma_lolo]

I have always homeschooled my two children in a VERY relaxed fashion. Really, we've just followed their interests and I have acted as a fascilitator to help them learn about the world. I introduce them to things, ie. books, games, places, and things, and help them explore the things that interest them.

 

My dd with PANDAS decided to try high school this year (first school experience) and took two classes first semester and is taking one second semester. Despite PANDAS issues, she fit right in and no one was the wiser for our years of really just having fun and learning as a side effect of living an interesting life.

 

I would recommend you enjoy your time with your child and not worry so much. They are already suffering so much and it is just adding to the stress to stress about school issues. What qualifies as "education" varies widely from classroom to classroom and you don't have to copy what they do at school in a large classroom to expose your child to educational things. Give him the gift of time and attention. The rest will happen naturally.

 

Thank you for this post. We are having a terrible time homeschooling my Grandson. Mother is worried he will be held back and then we'll never get him back to school. This is his 3rd PANDAS episode. Because he is so obstinate and argumentative, this G'ma has a hard time being too stern with him.I and his Uncles are his tutors while Mom and Dad work full time. They dive in when they get home or try to. Often met with stern resistance. He is a brilliant sensitive and sweet child(when not under attack) and his teachers and school have gone out of their way to give us whatever we need to work with him. He needs one of us to be there in the class with him or he melts down. I love that you suggested relaxing OURSELVES and that in turn may give us more smiles from our little guy. His teachers are not worried about him not making the grade. I guess we just have to REALLY accept that and work on some activities that are learning disguised as fun. Really....when he feels like it he can hammer out in 2 hours what his class prolly learns in 4 days. This disorder has nearly taken us all down and I guess we all just need to take a big breath and treasure the little moments where we see that child we know. They're so few lately. He had IVIG one month ago and I am sad to say his symptoms have worsened and I don't think my daughter is willing to do anything else right now....we are so heartbroken. We need to find some way to get back to happy in this crazy household.... Anyway, thank you for the "hall pass". I know I feel better after reading what you had to say and I hope I can calm the rest of the family with this info and forum. PeacenLove!

[gma_lolo]

I thought about homeschooling my son several years ago. I read about this method called spaced learning. I use it with my other son for studing. He bounces a basketball to destress. You can google it for more info. Baylor did a study about chewing gum and math. I also read that if your child learnings sometime and then goes to bed, his brain will reinforce the info during sleep.

 

Good luck

 

I am going to try this with my Grandson.(spaced learning) He is in constant motion even when doing schoolwork. We've been doing boardgames in the evening with him, needs us close by and I'm afraid any suggestion of schoolwork would be one of those battles we wouldn't win. He can count money like a seasoned cashier tho ) Monopoly rocks!

 

Thanks again PeacenLove Always

[momaine]

I have always homeschooled my two children in a VERY relaxed fashion. Really, we've just followed their interests and I have acted as a fascilitator to help them learn about the world. I introduce them to things, ie. books, games, places, and things, and help them explore the things that interest them.

 

My dd with PANDAS decided to try high school this year (first school experience) and took two classes first semester and is taking one second semester. Despite PANDAS issues, she fit right in and no one was the wiser for our years of really just having fun and learning as a side effect of living an interesting life.

 

I would recommend you enjoy your time with your child and not worry so much. They are already suffering so much and it is just adding to the stress to stress about school issues. What qualifies as "education" varies widely from classroom to classroom and you don't have to copy what they do at school in a large classroom to expose your child to educational things. Give him the gift of time and attention. The rest will happen naturally.

 

Thank you for this post. We are having a terrible time homeschooling my Grandson. Mother is worried he will be held back and then we'll never get him back to school. This is his 3rd PANDAS episode. Because he is so obstinate and argumentative, this G'ma has a hard time being too stern with him.I and his Uncles are his tutors while Mom and Dad work full time. They dive in when they get home or try to. Often met with stern resistance. He is a brilliant sensitive and sweet child(when not under attack) and his teachers and school have gone out of their way to give us whatever we need to work with him. He needs one of us to be there in the class with him or he melts down. I love that you suggested relaxing OURSELVES and that in turn may give us more smiles from our little guy. His teachers are not worried about him not making the grade. I guess we just have to REALLY accept that and work on some activities that are learning disguised as fun. Really....when he feels like it he can hammer out in 2 hours what his class prolly learns in 4 days. This disorder has nearly taken us all down and I guess we all just need to take a big breath and treasure the little moments where we see that child we know. They're so few lately. He had IVIG one month ago and I am sad to say his symptoms have worsened and I don't think my daughter is willing to do anything else right now....we are so heartbroken. We need to find some way to get back to happy in this crazy household.... Anyway, thank you for the "hall pass". I know I feel better after reading what you had to say and I hope I can calm the rest of the family with this info and forum. PeacenLove!

Glad to be of help. Live each day as if it is his last day on earth, helping him to find joy, and the learning will just happen as a side effect. People have too little confidence in a human's natural curiosity and desire to learn. It is there, we just need to foster it and not expect it to look like a classroom. If there is some subject he is interested in, whether it is pokemon or car racing or something more "educational", help him explore that subject by visiting the library to find boooks on the topic and just leave them around for him. Don't force them on him or he might think they are not interesting if you need to feed it to him. Visit places that bring him joy. Talk about life with him. He will learn.