Post-traumatic Stress Disorder

[nicklemama]

I can relate. I don't think I have a diagnosible case of PTSD but I definitely have some of the symptoms. When my DS does a behavior that seems to me like it might lead to an angry outburst (although he hasn't had one in a long time), I cringe and my anxiety goes through the roof. My heart beats fast and the feeling of panic sets in. It doesn't happen often, thankfully.

 

I wish I had time to take care of myself. I don't feel great and I have no opportunities for exercise. When school starts I am going to get back to it. I have health issues that cropped up in the late spring and now I have to do something. I've got no one to help me w/ my DS (except my dh who has to work to pay for all this), probably like most of you.

[Stephanie2]

Smartyjones, my mom takes sepia and it has helped her so much with her panic-y issues! She does nothing but smile these days! Amazing!

 

Anyway, I have an appt this week so we'll see what the homeopath thinks. In the last week I "snuck" a dose of my oldest son's remedy and it has helped so much but I'm still right on the edge of the next meltdown. Yesterday the boys were fighting (verbally) in the back seat and after 5 minutes my physical and mental response was over the top. I literally felt like I was going to pass out, became very fatigued, and it took everything I had not to literally slam on my brakes and kick my little ones out of the car! LOL! Not good. I used to have amazing patience. Gone. I guess the good news is that I did NOT slam on my brakes and make them walk home! For what it's worth, I'm just ducky when not in their presence! Ugh...

 

It has also helped me to realize exactly what is happening and that I DO have control over this response. I took my boys to the playground the other morning and started having trouble breathing thinking about the possibility that one or both of them will have a major tantrum when they are told it's time to leave. I just mentally tried to control my breathing, recognized that my fear is mostly irrational and luckily they were quite compliant getting back in the car. I have a feeling it is going to take a long time for me to realize that I can "trust" my boys' new behavior again. Until then, these outings and experiences are almost just as exhausting for me as the old dysfunctional outings were. It takes a lot out of me to face my fears.

 

Ladies, while I'm glad to see I'm not in this boat alone, it truly makes me sad to see so many of you respond that you are going through the same thing. I thought for sure that I would just go back to work and move on with my life, and I quickly realized that I am not the same person I was before this thing hit our home.