Young Child is asking about his vocal tics

[butterflymom]

=

Edited October 5, 2015 by tampicc

[Fixit]

I've not been sure how much to have conversations about tics, as he's only 5. Would it make him more self-conscious and worried to know that he has a disorder? Would it reassure him to understand that PANDAS causes it, and enable him to talk to me more about it?

 

 

He is obviously a very self awaar boy. He is not brushing this off as another child might. I do think you need to talk to him. Let him know that no matter what he does or what things he thinks about, nothing is too silly, weird, or uncomfortable for him to talk to you or your hubby about. You will always love him and he can confide in you and you will just keep it between you. And if when does talk to you, that that might actually help him because he let it out, and it will help you to figure out what is going on. It may take awhile to get everything right, but you will work together as a team and things will work out.

 

Let him know that there is something going on with his immune system and that the healthier you can live and stay the better things will be...and again, it will probably take a long time..(even if it doesn't, it buys you time in the future)

 

as he gets older you can talk about all the doctors and parents working on this and though sometimes it takes a very long time to get the combination right you wont stop till you get there.

Letting him know he does not have to worry about anything at home and that is his safe place and he can just relax and be himself will help him alot. You know that but he may not. And you may have to let the sitters know in advance so he can be himself then too

 

Sorry if this is choppy getting kids out door...

[NancyD]

Great response, Fixit!

[SarahJane]

We just tell our ds(6) that he's sick and that we're working to make him better. I've not gone into details about strep or anything tho'. I'll refer to the stuff he did when he was in exacerbation as examples of things we think he doesn't want to do & that he'd rather do nice things. Plus, I constantly ask him how he's feeling & he gets abx everyday. He'd tell me (when he could sorta articulate it) that he couldn't help it. And I'll tell him when he's doing stuff that we know is likely PANDAS that we understand that he can't help it because his brain is telling him to do things. (That's during the first hour...later on the conversation can go differently...let's say hour 4...BUT since IVIG, nothing lasts that long and the flipping we've seen isn't anything like pre-IVIG stuff.) It's hard at this age because you don't want them to think that there's anything WRONG with themselves, but at the same time, you need to acknowledge that there's a difference...especially when they acknowledge it. And at this age, with some of the behaviors & especially post-IVG, we wonder what's age appropriate & what's PANDAS. That your son is aware of it might be a good sign. Maybe if you have any lingering effects once he's better, it could mean that CBT or ERP would work. BUT once he's better, likely the tics and stuff won't be there & maybe he'll be able to recognize them as signs if anything like exposure/illness triggers them in the future.

[thereishope]

I just want to add a little bit that I have to choose my words carefully with my son. Once when I tried to talk to my son about his PANDAS, I used the phrase "when you get sick...." Well, that then led to him asking a few times for me to take his temperature cause he was worried he was getting sick and he didn't want to act that way.

 

Then if he got a cold and I would say "I think you're getting sick." I think he'd worry more.

 

One mom on here once compared tics to hiccups to explain it to a class. Another compared it to blinking (something you just do without thinking). I thought those were good comparisons that kids can relate to.