Hi DCmom,
In DS's case it appears to be intense social anxiety and fear of failure at what he attempts (perfectionism...although his handwriting can be very sloppy (again, deteriorates noticeably with each exacerbation or when upset or tired), his room is messy, etc., but it's like an internal expectation of perfectionism.)
No one has been able to identify the actual OCD fear and he hasn't told anyone what it is if he has it. Thanks for the insight you provided, maybe we need to push harder to see if we can pin down a specific fear. His first therapist said 'no OCD', just mania (he was moving toward a bipolar/mood disorder dx)...DS didn't like first therapist at all, so we switched to one that we think is great. Current therapist says he doesn't meet the dx criteria for mania, he's just 'wound up' sometimes in an ADHD type way, but again, no id. of an actual OCD fear. When he's in an exacerbation he has lots of intrusive and scary thoughts and becomes hyperfocused on a particular thing or activity for hours at a time, before dropping that and moving to something else. Interestingly, when we saw Dr. L (about 2 months after we'd seen Dr. B and started augmentin, which resulted in a rapid and notable improvement), DS took the self-reported Childhood Yale-Brown OCD scale and accidently filled it in for how he'd been feeling before abx -- he scored a 27. Then Dr. L asked him to fill it in for how he was doing on that particular day, and he scored a 6 (he was doing pretty well after a few months on abx.)
He's not on any SSRI's right now, but things are getting to the point where we might need to try one again (Zoloft wasn't successful last year). His allergies started bothering him again last week, and Zyrtec, which we restarted last week was definitely activating him, so the ped just prescribed Vistaril at my suggestion (thanks to the board for telling me about it)...I'm hoping it will also help with anxiety without sedating him--he takes Nasonex too, but apparently it's not enough this time of year.
His first IVIG is in a month, and we're hoping not to make any more med changes until well after that so we can disentangle the effect of IVIG from the effect of any med. Our hopes are pinned on it, hopefully it will help -- like 1tiredmama, things are getting rough again right now. So grateful we have this board with others who understand how rough things can get and provide hope.