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As I've mentioned in my post about how to get DS out of the house, we may have an appointment tomorrow. DS was complaining about his stomach and I casually mentioned that we will have to go out and have someone check everything out at some point. He got annoyed and anxious and told me to stop talking about it. I said that I'm only interested in helping him get better.

 

Should I mention an appointment again, or just wait to see tomorrow and "spring" it on him??

 

We will know at 7:15am and the appointment probably won't be before noon with one hour of travel time needed.

 

Thoughts?

 

My guy is that I'd prefer he relax today. I don't think a warning will make him any more accommodating or less anxious.

 

T.Anna

Ds15

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I think you are probably right. Under normal circumstances, you would give them time to process the information and so forth but this is anything but normal. I have been where you are in that I wondered how I would physically get my daughter into the car and to the office. People thought I was crazy and I heard all the lines about "Who's in charge anyway?" and all that crap (sorry, still fresh wounds). So, I feel for you. It would be good if you could give him something to help his anxiety some. I would just wait till you have to break the news. The less time he can worry the better. You just have to get through it the best way you can. I am sending positive thoughts and best wishes your way. Sorry you are having such a hard time. My heart goes out to you.

 

Dedee

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We have the same experience as EA mom- there is NO WAY I could spring it on either child. Both INSIST they need to know. I usually tell them WAY in advance, and then remind them every week until the appt arrives.

 

I try to work with them to not "worry and stress" until the hour before..... I think it is a life lesson.

 

But- I think you need to go with your gut!

 

And yes- we have carried (the little one) kicking and screaming (literally), but she usually calms down by the time we arrive. I usually have two adults escorting her to appt for this reason. Older one has always wanted to go, never been so bad that she doesn't want the help (thank goodness!).

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Had our appointment. He walked on his own between his father and grandfather. He had a huge meltdown and was crying, but got in the car. Wouldn't get out once we got there, but dr. Came into the car to examine him.

 

Will post more tomorrow.

T.anna

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DD has been rage free for two days now and we also made it to the doctors office. She actually was pretty calm. I could see the anxiety building up as we were in the exam room for quite a while. I managed to change her mood with distracting her a couple of time. She made it back to the car ok. We have a lab and another doctor's appointment tomorrow. I'm hoping she can manage it again. Two weeks ago she refused to see the doctor and it was easy to tell she would have a panic attack if we pushed her so we backed off. but then she was ok to do her labs. DD used to need advance notice but now if try that and it's too long of a wait it makes her flip out.

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Had our appointment. He walked on his own between his father and grandfather. He had a huge meltdown and was crying, but got in the car. Wouldn't get out once we got there, but dr. Came into the car to examine him.

 

Will post more tomorrow.

T.anna

What a great doctor! My daughter's doctor has done exams outside in the private courtyard, sometimes in the hallway. Those that get it, get it.

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By the way, we spoke to our local volunteer ambulance company. They said that there are ambulette services that will come to transfer patients to appointments and to the hospital. You may have to pay, but it might be worth getting the numbers locally, we have one and were very close to calling yesterday.

 

T.Anna

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Doctor visits can be horible. We made it through two over the weekend the last one DD wasn't raging but she was having anxieity attacks. I had to calm her down three times. The last doctor's office was the worst we've ever been to. We had to wait for two hours. even after explaining to the staff the situation they just kept telling lies to appeas. I'm not inclined to ever let that happen again.

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Anna. Glad you were able to get him there. I was wondering something though....is his raging getting worse? He is being treated for PANDAS, right? Aren't the antibiotics helping or does he have more going on. I really feel for you. Gettingmy girl to appointments take soooo much out me. People have no idea. I get the same comment that dedee gets..."who's in charge here?" I am numb to them now. Don't have the energy to explain anymore. Good luck with everything.

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