smartyjones Posted August 7, 2012 Report Posted August 7, 2012 i just had to share this as only the members here can really understand my pandas ds, 8, has many sibling issues that have ranged from what i believe to be OCD exactness that i think relates to concerns for brother's health and safety to normal 2 year younger of a same-sex pair issues. we range from addressing and working on things to letting things go that help his independence or foster his personal needs. ds has been treated for parasites before without much seeming results, good, bad or indifferent. our integrative MD has had some recent discoveries and situations with patients and has taken a re-look at some of his patients. he put ds on a new parasite remedy. after about 4-5 days, we saw a ramp up in some old troublesome behaviors and i worried ds was showing some infeciton. then i remembered he had just started this remedy. behaviors cycled and subsided in a few more days. about day 10, he was back to his normal self behaviorally. around that time, he developed a rash i worried could be anal strep. that improved with calendula and a vitamin E/tea tree oil cream. so -- today i was helping them get ready for a bike ride and filing their camelbak water bladders. ds is usually concerned about which one is whose -- only difference is a black or blue ring. we remove the mouthpiece and wash so they get mixed up anyway. i think this is a 'mine' issue anyway, not contamination. i say to him, "i can never remember, which one is yours and which one is B's?" he trots over to me, looks at them, looks at me and says, "does it matter?' i felt like a cartoon whose whole head rattles. i laughed and said, "usually to you it does." he shrugged his shoulders, said no and walked away. i've just been laughing about this the whole day. . ." DOES IT MATTER?"
MomWithOCDSon Posted August 7, 2012 Report Posted August 7, 2012 Can totally relate! Glad you got a "shrug of the shoulders/go with the flow" sort of response! With my DS, if would have been a contamination (as opposed to a "mine") concern, but once the OCD moves on, his response is very similar to your DS's: "Does it matter?" As in: "I forgot to floss tonight; does it matter?" "I meant to trim my nails but forgot; does it matter?" "I just drank out of this glass that was left on the table, but I'm not sure if it was mine; does it matter?" In our case, it's still a subtle form of reassurance seeking, I think, but I'll take that any day over meltdowns over the same, inane circumstances! Hope you enjoyed your bike ride!
cobbiemommy Posted August 7, 2012 Report Posted August 7, 2012 :D Very, very happy for you and your son! You both have earned it! People who have not lived it, cannot truly appreciate what a sweet victory that is! Cobbie
LNN Posted August 8, 2012 Report Posted August 8, 2012 One of my sisters is "famous" for sending out a holiday newsletter that raves about how well her kids and grandkids are doing. One year early in our Pandas days, I sent a mock newsletter to my other sister, bragging about how my son was overcoming his OCD and now only had to touch things twice instead of 10 times, saying how proud we were that my daughter wasn't going insane on a daily basis. The second sister (who struggles with bipolar) appreciated the humor (don't think the first sister would have). I love these moments, where you get to see the real kid, the kid you know is in there but the rest of the world rarely gets to see. These are the moments you hold onto, the ones that get you through the dark times. This year, you can send out your holiday cards bragging about your "does it matter?" accomplishments! It is way bigger than any report card or sports championship - congratulations to him!! (and you for getting him there).
Aimee De Pooretere Posted August 8, 2012 Report Posted August 8, 2012 i just had to share this as only the members here can really understand my pandas ds, 8, has many sibling issues that have ranged from what i believe to be OCD exactness that i think relates to concerns for brother's health and safety to normal 2 year younger of a same-sex pair issues. we range from addressing and working on things to letting things go that help his independence or foster his personal needs. ds has been treated for parasites before without much seeming results, good, bad or indifferent. our integrative MD has had some recent discoveries and situations with patients and has taken a re-look at some of his patients. he put ds on a new parasite remedy. after about 4-5 days, we saw a ramp up in some old troublesome behaviors and i worried ds was showing some infeciton. then i remembered he had just started this remedy. behaviors cycled and subsided in a few more days. about day 10, he was back to his normal self behaviorally. around that time, he developed a rash i worried could be anal strep. that improved with calendula and a vitamin E/tea tree oil cream. so -- today i was helping them get ready for a bike ride and filing their camelbak water bladders. ds is usually concerned about which one is whose -- only difference is a black or blue ring. we remove the mouthpiece and wash so they get mixed up anyway. i think this is a 'mine' issue anyway, not contamination. i say to him, "i can never remember, which one is yours and which one is B's?" he trots over to me, looks at them, looks at me and says, "does it matter?' i felt like a cartoon whose whole head rattles. i laughed and said, "usually to you it does." he shrugged his shoulders, said no and walked away. i've just been laughing about this the whole day. . ." DOES IT MATTER?"
Dedee Posted August 8, 2012 Report Posted August 8, 2012 Oh, yes that is a good one! Last week, my daughter actually had a "pretend" meltdown. I told her she couldn't do something and she fell to the floor and pretended to cry (she hadn't done this for a while). When she saw my reaction, she started to laugh hysterically. It took my by such surprise that I was actually speechless!
DeterminedMomVA Posted August 8, 2012 Report Posted August 8, 2012 Oh, yes that is a good one! Last week, my daughter actually had a "pretend" meltdown. I told her she couldn't do something and she fell to the floor and pretended to cry (she hadn't done this for a while). When she saw my reaction, she started to laugh hysterically. It took my by such surprise that I was actually speechless! I can so relate. After a February diagnosis and 6 months of abx treatment (6 months on Augmentin and 2 months of Zithro) my son the best he's been since last summer. He also had a 'pretend' meltdown this week, and then when we started to get really worried about his reaction to a minor thing, he took great joy in saying "gotcha" to us and laughing joyfully. I'm so glad that our kids are improving.
kos_mom Posted August 8, 2012 Report Posted August 8, 2012 So amused by the title of your post. But it hit close to home as well. When my DS was 9 his explanation for what was happening to him was that an alien on another planet was controlling his body. So nice to have a reverse abduction story!
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