Pandas daughter wants to read Saving Sammy

[dcmom]

I have two PANDAS daughters, 7 and 10. Like Sammy, they had overnight onset, somewhat severe. They are both doing well now, although not 100%.

 

My ten year old asked me (out of the blue) tonight, when she could read Saving Sammy.

 

I am at a loss as to what I think (which rarely happens to me).

 

Thoughts? Suggestions?

 

Thanks.

[T_Mom]

Hi DCMom! Our oldest d read it the summer before she turned 12. I think it helped her in that she saw there really were other people with Pandas, and they got better! She is quite mature for her age.

 

She told me she felt badly for Sammy as he was so severe.

We chuckled about that as my d had extreme symptoms herself--As you know, it is definitely a story of hope and a comeback from severe OCD neuropsych issues. I let her watch the video clip and pointed out how together Sammy is as a young adult--what an inspiration.

 

Maybe you could read it together or edit as you see fit if there are sections that may be upsetting to her?

Edited November 30, 2010 by T.Mom

[emmalily]

Made me feel better to see the book, honestly, and know I wasn't the only one.

 

Are there particular parts you don't want her to read? Could you mark off certain chapters that you think would be OK for her to read?

[Debbie1]

dcmom,

 

My pandas daughter (13) is an avid reader. She has not asked to read the book, but to be honest, I have shielded her from it. I don't think my daughter realizes how bad her symptoms were at their worst and to a great extent, I would like to keep it that way. My daughter's symptoms were nothing like Sammy's (although ds9's pandas experience was more similar) and I wonder if reading about what pandas did to Sammy may scare her into thinking that it could happen to her too. Beth's emotions as the mom of a pandas child are expressed as well and I am not sure I would want her to realize how difficult it has been on us.

 

I have let her watch clips of Lauren J. on the Today Show. My daughter had tics without OCD and I felt it was good for her to see another girl her age who was going through something similar and got better.

 

That being said, T.Mom's reply is thought provoking and making me rethink my position. Maybe I am being too overprotective.

[tantrums]

I think it's hard for me to judge since my DS is only 7 and has major fears around things he sees happening to him. I myself, cried hysterically from fear through reading that - thinking that was our future. I'd never let my DS read it.

 

I think it completely depends on your child and if you think she can handle it. Obviously, if she can get to the positive ending, it shows things will improve

[ajcire]

I think if my son had a severe sudden onset I would not be against him reading it.. or me reading it with him. My son's pandas is more subtle and he would not see similarities between himself and Sammy.

[Mary M]

That's an interesting question...one I have not yet had to face with my dd but would echo that a decision about reading Saving Sammy would need to be individualized for each child.

 

There was a time when I would leave Gary's website up on our computer in hopes my daughter would happen to look at it. I do think that it is very helpful to understand that you are not alone in any illness or crisis situation....we all have this forum. But what do our children have to ensure that they do not feel isolated and alone in this? I keep thinking that a forum for our kids would be helpful too...but it would have to be safe and that is a major internet dilemma.

Mary

from Michigan

[tantrums]

My son seemed to feel a HUGE sense of relief when I got the DVD of "I have Tourette's but Tourette's doesnt' have me" and let him watch it. In fact, he watched it repeatedly. It opened up a lot of discussion and he let me know a lot of what he was feeling. Of course, I had to explain TS wasn't exactly what he had, but he seemed so relieved to see other kids with tics and to have it explained to him in "kid terms". I highly recommend that!

[KaraM]

I think the suggestion of reading it together is a good one.

The only page I remember that I would worry about is the one where Sammy says something like "sometimes, I think death would be a better choice."

Yikes.

 

My PANDAS dd8 doesn't really know about it. My non-PANDAS ds11 did ask to read it a while ago. I didn't have a copy at the time. Now I do - and I am going to let him if he still wants to.

 

I think a lot depends on the maturity of your child as well.

 

 

[T_Mom]

Hmmm, in reading the replies above I relate to every one of them!

 

I wanted to add that my youngest d who is 11 now, (also Pandas), I would not let her read the book (if she were to ask) until she was much older. She is more impressionable and may focus on the negative (and we don't want to encourage internalizing of anything more!)

 

I guess it really comes down to each individual child and when/if they would be helped (rather then harmed) by reading of Sammy's experience--