Eric

I am telling you--- Marinol-- is the difference from wanting to jump of a cliff (it could not be a high one, I have trouble in high places, I would have to rely on the manner and form of the fall, to do anything self-serving to this whole concept)-- but serious--I am in your club-- second by second panic--I even have a staff of reporters to give me updates and stuff-- Marinol-- it is comfortable -- but-- expensive-- see my treads on it-- this might work for you---I have messed with all the icky stuff too-- I think it would be proper for you-- hey--when you can through intellectual reasoning---you can separate the irrational---and when you know--what you are feeling (OCD symptoms) is not based on reality or reason--you can give it permission to, not necessary to go, or get rid of it, just try to reason with it as one would reason with a irrational child---easier said than done--- however--when I use Marinol--- it slows me down and takes the edge off enough---that I can look at the material that goes through my head---more as a witness---we all know it is not gonna stop--- however---the Marinol gives me a fighting chance to sort out these unnatural tendencies---the Marinol does not give you a false sense of security(for me )-- almost similar between getting really work up--and freaked out--about something that turned out to have no substance at all--- then later--you feel silly and relaxed about--what you just were freaking out over---even "normal" people go through this deduction-- anyway--my point is--Marinol allows me a chance to do this---something that otherwise would kidnap my mind--- has less pull--less strength-- to pull me away from a sense of reality--that actually kind of feels normal-- anyway--if you want to learn more--let--me know- hope that made sense--I am as wacked out as you-- but---about 4 hours after taking Marinol--I start to come back down to planet earth a little if you will-- goodluck--you are not alone in this, scary scary nightmarish world that OCD TS brings--check out my thread on Marinol on the braintalk board to--if thou wilt? Eric

I am glad you embrace the idea.... I forgot to mention-- I am very interested in handwritten writings-- That personal touch adds to the dynamic and impact-- I speculate many with this disorder have a certain richness, wildness, and character to their handwriting-- I will love to have it all...- spelling mistakes, outside lines, inconsistent letter/word size, hand presser, anything that connotes personal struggle or human emotion-- I also speculate that the children will have the most interesting interplay on this premise- It is important that we place worth and value on ours words-- For most of our words work against us-- just as much as our bodies also work against us-- it is easy to proclaim dismay- in response to a motor tic-- a motor tic which is hard to believe serves any purpose at all-- serves no benefit... Equivocal in the unseen world of ours-- The world of words that swoon in agony to have purpose-- If we encourage the expression of this thick and surreal world, just a little bit... We can finally align purpose-- finally subscribe purpose to our words-- Words that are often times counterproductive and self-immolating-- This media (collection of writings) offer an opportunity to preserve those hard won words-- to cast them in a book-- proves that TS can't take everything from us---It may have the ability to steal every moment-- but--it can not take our words anyway-- Indeed, it is a way to say-- "that moment was mine"---when we look at a piece of writing we finished--for the sake of expression and nothing else--and even if it was the hardest thing we attempted to do (to put one's personal experience in words, or even just try to sit still enough to write)—even if we break 4 pens along the way-- especially for a younger child to share or refer back to something that is tangible,-they can touch it, feel the paper, knowing that--this is a part of them---that potential can teach them that--one can squeeze something of worth from this miserable stone-- that something in them does have purpose, does have worth, and is a value to others-- after all-- it is hard to think anything good can come from this condition (at times)- To think that the turmoil these kids shoulder (and, the rest of us) day by day--when they turn to face it--and express it-- All of a sudden--valuable meaning and purpose can be derived from such a horrific monstrosity of a disorder-- Anyway--I may have went a little overboard on my point-- However- I go overboard even when I am doing the dishes.... Anyway--all wound up and nowhere to go- Eric

This is not a question of will I do this… Just how and when- I have yet to explore ramifications (time, expensive, publication sizes, and so on)— But—at the very least I could easily make a prototype in my basement—via computer and my graphic design/art/photography background— I am deeply interested in assembling a collection of poetry/writings (perhaps, even art or photography) from people with TS and/or associative disorders- With a equal emphasis on age groups— also a section for parents/friends too For it has been through the arts--- that one can address matters of acceptance, healing, and relation—address all the subject matter that westernized medicine simply does not have the facilities, empathy, ability, or patients to deal with… (Most of the time) Sometimes there is no better treatment—than finding relation in someone else’s equivocal hardships-in writing- Never are tears more honest and real—I believe the magical relation that would be created by this---would most importantly—sooth and affect the children and adults alike living with TS-- Not all of us—have the luxury of a support group—this would be a support group in the form of a book—that one could bring anywhere--- And everyone that has that moment—that they feel they are utterly alone with this disorder--- could refer to the book—to be reminded that they are not… Anyway—we all get the premise—I am looking for, interest and input— If there is already a book like this---there should be two! Anyway—I am sincerely interested in this project- p.s—forgive my fragmented phasing and sentence structure—I am too distracted by motor tics to write in proper form or complete sentences—unless necessary—after all how many of us (TS) think in complete anythings… anyway… Thanks--Eric

everyone here has drowned me with support--for that I thank-- ok--what exactly is--5HTP--or--SSI??? of the thousand links I have visited about TS-- I happened upon this one-- this has given me the most info and support- -Eric

FOR LINDA(GUEST)--with 23 yr son--- I was having a confusing moment and think I posted this twice in incorrect threads--anyway-ignore the confusion-please... I feel it is worth the mention--- please refer--to my "Marinol" thread---and--look at my "light sensitivity" for an example of how pronounced my TS is---if your son is similar... Marinol is worth taking a look at--- Thus far it is doing the job of 3 drugs otherwise- it is addressing my hypertension, depression, sleep problems, rage tics, helps my chronic pain from the strain of the movements- and it has only been a week... I again am 27--and, have been on a string of meds--all causing more trouble than they are worth-- I can relate instantly-- indeed, the first and end product of the TS nightmare--from beginning to end, beyond all other overtones---depression is always your companion--Indeed, TS can destroy every ounce of joy you otherwise would have a fighting chance to feel---sometimes one is not even given the option... let me know if I can help- Eric

I feel it is worth the mention--- please refer--to my "Marinol" thread---and--look at my "light sensitivity" for an example of how pronounced my TS is---if your son is similar... Marinol is worth taking a look at--- Thus far it is doing the job of 3 drugs otherwise- it is addressing my hypertension, depression, sleep problems, rage tics, helps my chronic pain from the strain of the movements- and it has only been a week... I again am 27--and, have been on a string of meds--all causing more trouble than they are worth-- I can relate instantly-- indeed, the first and end product of the TS nightmare--from beginning to end, beyond all other overtones---depression is always your companion--Indeed, TS can destroy every ounce of joy you otherwise would have a fighting chance to feel---sometimes one is not even given the option... let me know if I can help- Eric

I feel it is worth the mention--- please refer--to my "Marinol" thread---and--look at my "light sensitivity" for an example of how pronounced my TS is---if your son is similar... Marinol is worth taking a look at--- Thus far it is doing the job of 3 drugs otherwise- it is addressing my hypertension, depression, sleep problems, rage tics, helps my chronic pain from the strain of the movements- and it has only been a week... I again am 27--and, have been on a string of meds--all causing more trouble than they are worth-- I can relate instantly-- indeed, the first and end product of the TS nightmare--from beginning to end, beyond all other overtones---depression is always your companion--Indeed, TS can destroy every ounce of joy you otherwise would have a fighting chance to feel---sometimes one is not even given the option... let me know if I can help- Eric

http://www.irlen.com/ http://www.irlen.com/index_autism.html http://www.irlen.com/index_sss.html there are many more-- if your in the northwest--"search for Irlen center northwest-- if you are not aware---this could be life changing for anyone with TS-- I would rant on and on about it--however---there is lots of info about this---and most people in the medical profession--do not take this serious---so most have to explore it on there own- my own doctor viewed this as part of my OCD of "having some fear of light".... anyway--I wear special tinted glasses--I basically wear my sunglasses at night-indeed--I will not leave a room with out them! it is the difference between complete fight or flight--or--coping... I struggled with this first--then found out the TS later--they seemed to have a call and response to my TS-- any--there is only one person that tesst for this in the Northwest--I have all her contact info--- plus--of all things--and--how I even found out about this---is--a women from my own town wrote the first entire book on it!! anyway--even BORDERS BOOKS carries it--I have that info as well-- anyway--I got tested in Bellevue, WA----and found out that--that out of 2000 people tested over 10 years--I was in her top 20 people-- I can hardly read this right now- anyway--this crosses the borders of many disorders-- however--there are many pro -s and con-s to getting the glasses--plus as they are related to TS people--as opposed to people without-- thank you(everyone) for the kindness and info-- Eric

Greetings-- my name is Eric Gaudet--I am from Yakima-Wa I was wondering if anyone out there with TS---has extreme sensitivities to light/ more importantly artificial lighting--- these for me--- not only triggers--but--mulitply ALL! my symptoms--- trust me--this addition is not user friendly--considering I have very intense, explosive and violent motor tics---complex and involve multiple muscle groups all at once-- anyway--I am a work of art---and have yet to communicate with anyone as bad as I-- in a typical moment or bout...best expressed in an isolated moment for sake of example- for example while I was trying to sit at a TS conference-- after rocking and pacing before the chair(repeating words,and trying to calm myself down long enough to sit in a chair--for about 2minutes)-- I finally force myself to sit--for we are about to start-- 30seconds in (this is standard process for me)--the surge starts, my eyes roll back into my head-later my neck is pulled back then wiped violently back and forth 10 times, arms thrown -up-and for about 5 seconds I am pinned and twisted around facing backwards now--then--I am trown almost by unnatural means---up and out of my chair--with a lightning jump---a minor second later(for I am hardly done-smile) I follow through with 3 puches to the wall next to me---followed by 7-10 puches to my chest---followed by double-fisted puches to my face and head----Then---a shoulder tic--that throws me into the wall 4 times--I bounce back and recover--only to scream the F word--and start hitting my head against my knee--- this all happened in about 30 seconds--I follow through with the old-"I meant to do that look"--- stick my hand in my pockets grab a pen to dart done some notes I heard WHILE I was having a bout---only to break the pen--throw my note pad---and go right back into a same but different arrangement of movements again----APPLY and REPEAT Indeed---as YOU CAN SEE--all of this is very painful--mainly because this happens all day--in different degrees anyway--teach me to attend a 8 hour conference--indeed--the irony is there-- this is only a small percent of what I do--and how it interplays-- I have all the minor tics too--sniffing, coughing, make sounds/hum/--have excessive blinking---facial tics that will dart my eyes open-even from deep sleep---sometime when I drive my eyes force themselves shut(nice huh)--I repeat my words,phases, stutter---bite my cheek--tense my jaw--clench my teeth-- yell at people(sometime I can tell if for sport or out of disorder) anyway--I am sure I left something out---anyway---I am 27--and just found out 6 months ago what this was all about--I am sure many of you have similar exoeriences--with wonder what the ###### is wrong with you---no doctor takes you serious--blah blah blah then--you find out hey--it is TS,OCD,ADHD,SID!!! anyway--The last thing this is --is a competition however--I have yet to meet anyone as bad as I(I have meet people with worse vocal tics-however) AND--I seem to be a late bloomer---most TS -are children-- I currently taking MARINOL---10mg--very expensive(300.00$$-plus for a 30day)---It is making a small dent---but---usually the only thing that will put me down is a baseball bat- I almost never sleep---and again--my example is from a low lit enviroment---put under artifical lights---and I turn into the Hulk-- Mind you--I am a benevolent being with a tendency towards eastern thought-- it would be easier to deal with myself--if I was a thug or criminal--anyway--perhaps-- I need to change professions---of late--I encourage my friends to make movie fighting sounds--kung foo sounds---or I just try to turn my movements into a real poor attempt to breakdance--or--I follow through with the "ROBOT-dance" anyway--I even bring a pillow to class so punch--and encourage other students to bring pictures of ex-girl/boy-friends or enemies--and I will cast my magical fury upon them--after I tape their photo to the pillow--that is- anyway--it is my hope to offer my experiences to others struggling with TS-- and--if anything may I prove to be an example to others---that at least one's own TS is not as bad as this(smile) hey- even I was thankful I dont say F-god--every 5 seconds--like that 9yr girls--I ask her if she would trade with me for a day??--she said--no way!! Again--I am by no measure competing--I would just like to relate to someone else at this level of severity-- I view anyone with even a slight sniff, or cough with the same compassion as for someone that is as bad as I-- my concern and encouragement is unconditional---I would not wish this on anyone-- Eric Gaudet--- and--again--if anyone has light issues--I have something that will help!(SMILE)

um, Im a little spac-cy--I may have replied--to an incorrect thread---anyway---may not address thread topic- anyway-- Eric---

I am afraid I know what you speak of--- I also have really bad facial tics-- I have yet to find a way to cope with them---however-- I will share that-- breathing in through the nose before a vocal tics--will tend to negate the tic---for you can not make sound while you are breathing in-- anyway---this is not a competition---however--but---if anything---one thing that seems to help others---is knowing that other people suffer more intense tics and hardship(smile)---thus far---I have yet to meet or observe anyone that is as bad as I am--(with the exception of involved vocal tics--for I just met a 9yr girl who says-"F-God!) anyway-- my TS is pretty insane---take too long to list it all--TS-ADHD-OCD-SID(sensory intergration disorder) I have explosive, violent--multi-muscle groups-motor tics--during these extreme bouts I end -up--punching and hitting things around me--but--mostly I hit myself-- soo--typical minute stretch... from a sitting position--I will be thrown up--jerk my neck back--strike my chest 6-12 times--have some facial tics--vocal sounds/noises(sometimes a swear)--whites of eyes--my whole body will end up slamming against the wall(if there is one) there)repeating words, I give myself black eyes(even when I sleep)-- anyway--all this usually happens aaaaaaaaaaaaaal at once! anyway--the list goes on--as with the many different forms of this--- anyway---come to think of it(this is my first post)I am trying to find someone to relate to that is this bad--so you may refer to a new post from me--that will go more deeply into detail--if you are wondering for more?? anyway--hang in there---I get kicked out of bars--cuz--I forgot to tell them--and end up hitting walls and breaking pint glasses(smile)-- they think I am on streetdrugs! Eric Gaudet--Yakima WA