This is so not me...please help

[sf2688]

okay so i have unbearable anxiety about whether or not i love my boyfriend anymore....ironically the only time i can calm myself down is when he is around...and i really don't want to fall out of love with him because hes amazing. the thought of it makes me turn in circles. when he is around, i still feel anxious and i worry about being cold. this OCD is making me a very cold, scared, and nervous person all the time...and its not who i was. before i got diagnosed two months ago, i was happier than ever with my boyfriend. everything was perfect. now i worry hes not the one, that theres maybe someone better..i just cant take it. my parents dont make it better because i know they dont feel hes the one for me even though he treats me amazing...i feel like i want to throw up all the time, and im always pacing when i get nervous. i cant sleep. my school demands leave me with minimal therapy...ive lost a lot of weight...is it always bad the first couple months??? its all so new...Also, i'm taking lexapro and ive been on it for three weeks now, and i dont feel it is helping!!!! i feel the same nervousness....Its not like i get nervous because of a particular situation, i get nervous because of my own brain...i'm scared...i want to be with him......if anyone else is in this situation please...let me know. these forums are the only things keeping me going because its nice to know that people get it ..especially when nobody else does.

[alwysnervous]

 

 

Hi, I want you to know that you are NOT the only one. I was on many meds but didn't have a boyfriend for a long time, then I met my boyfriend. My ocd wasn't as bad when I met him and things went really good at first. Then I started to think,"But what if he's not right for me? What if I can find someone better? Am I better off with this depression to just be alone?" I am just starting a different med, luvox and I am really depressed but it hasn't been a month yet. I know it seems like terrible. I feel so guilty for thinking these things. I also know what a terrible feeling it can be when ocd is really bad and starting a new med makes you feel 100 moods. Don't give up on your med just yet. Maybe you need a combo of meds like I have. I think maybe clonazepam or ativan or xanax might be good if your not feeling the proper relief from lexapro. Also, wellbutrin is a mood stabilizer and is often added to an anti-depressant when you're sex drive is low in hopes of lessening that side effect somewhat. Anytime you want to talk, I'm here. I don't know what to do. I am really depressed right now and have lost interest in almost everything I used to like. I am always bored, even around my boyfriend(which brings the what if questions back. Look up OCD spikes on google and you will see that you are having a relationship spike. PLEASE LOOK IT UP IT WILL MAKE YOU FEEL SO MUCH BETTER. It may be the thing that puts your mind at ease. Hang in there, ok?