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  1. I have been on the boards for over 4 1/2 years. I've learned so much, tried so much, have enough bottles to open my own alternative medicine store. We've done ivig, plasmapheresis, and are now at this point doing both MD and ND mix of treatment. Within the last month I've had a bit of a breakdown. As much of a breakdown as a mother of a pandas child is able to. But I've stopped being able to remember things, am unable to answer questions, can't stop crying, can't poop, and can literally feel myself closing in on myself. To keep the story short, I've been recommended to a trauma counselor. I've realized that I had a very traumatic childhood and my dd needs are calling up all the trauma from when I was a kid. I'm telling you this because I've always wondered why I've watched the other kids heal and mine only goes thru ups and downs. And the ups aren't that "up". I believe my issues are holding her back. I'm smart enough not to beat myself up over this. At least yet. But someone else out there could be in the same boat. I've also found I'm one stage away from Addison's disease which is adrenal failure. I have a lot to work on
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