First off...take a deep breath and relax. I too have suffered from the same exact thoughts. You begin to question your actions and beliefs even though they occur naturally like being attracted to women. All of a sudden you find yourself asking the questions "why am I attracted to boobs or why aren't gay men attracted to women" and because you are now analyzing it...your natural abilities disappear for some reason. Why, I don't know but that's how my brain has percieved it. I have had the exact same thoughts as you...I have always been completely heterosexual, have never had any desire to well you know, do stuff with guys (nasty! but completely okay if you so desire). However, my obsessive thoughts get into the mix and I think "what if I am but just don't know it" or "what if I am just ignoring it" Here is what you have to think about, it is okay to have those thought, to find other men good looking, or even sexy. We are all human and sexuality is the most complicated thing that even the best doctors can not fully explain. I went to a shrink to talk about this stuff and he educated me on human sexuality...he said that there is no one who is completely straight or completely gay...we all end up somewhere in the middle. For men, it is more difficult because if we show any "signs" of playing for the other team we must be...and that does not help us who suffer from obsessive compulsive thoughts. But really, it is okay, you love your girlfriend and that is all that matters. One thing I do when obsessive thoughts come into my head is just replace those thoughts with one sentence "obsesive compulsive" . This helps becuase now I know why I do it. Also, it helps to understand human sexuality and that it is okay to have thoughts...it is human nature, the problem is, people who suffer from obsesive thoughts turn them into emergencies as opposed to simply dismissing them like other people can. Talking to my shrink about this stuff really helped me and has almost cured this type of thinking...knowing the cause is half the battle...please talk to someone about this...you will be doing yourself a favor. It is all about the way you think of things...your turned on in the office and you think is there a man near by? but is there a female near by also? Instead of obesising on the negative turn it around and look at the positive. Will you always be turned on by your girlfriend every second you are with her...of course not, now that would be wierd! I hope other people respond to you and that this post helps you. Good luck and it is okay.
hi, i have ocd too and have sexual thoughts that i dont want in anyways. I have a loving husband and beautiful son one can ever imagine, and still im occupied with these stupid disgusting thoughts. you mentioned that "your shrink said noone is completely straight or gay"what do u mean by this?? i mean its more confusing to think that way. One is one way..by nature God has made men to be attracted to women and women to be attracted to men. how awful it would be that you call yourself hetrosexual, and yet you believe you are not completely that? that's more disgusting. I think the better approach is that its true everyone gets those thoughts and they are natural but it doesnt mean we get it because we stay somewhere in the middle..that would upset the natural law of mother nature, not being sure who is what, and just be hanging in middle. So when we get thoughts like those, we can just think these are just thoughts and deep inside we know we would never do such disgusting acts nor we are attracted to the thoughts we get, for ex hetrosexual men getting thoughts of homosexuality. They know they feel disgusted to think that way but still they get those thoughts, so it doesnt mean they are getting those thoughts becauase they stand in the middle, they get thouse thoughts naturally, and they just have to learn that those are just thoughts and they are not acting upon it nor they are that way. and by just letting them come and not thinking about them make them go away themselves.
I will appreciate if you would comment on this , or make it more clear to what your shrink said. thanks it was just confusing to me.
