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could this be autism?


gasman

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My girlfriends son has been crying lately for no reason at all if you even look at him wrong he just bursts out crying. I've been reading online that it could be a sign of abuse but when he's home I'm around him almost the whole time and I know his mother wouldn't be doing anything like that. He goes to his dads every now and then and when he comes back he acts totally different hes obnoxious and won't listen to anything you tell him and he will hide from me when his mom first brings him home like he's scared of me until I give him a toy or pick him up and start kissing and hugging on him then he seems to be fine with me but still cries about rediculious things that make no sense to cry about. I don't think his father would be abusing him either I know he has basically no rules when he goes over there and his dad goes out and parties pretty much every night hes there and his grandpa always watches him. Sense i'm pretty sure he isn't being abused do you thing his father is telling him that i'm bad and filling his head up with stuff? For a long time his father didn't know that I was with his mom and seeing his son all the time and he used to love me and be mad when I left and follow me around and even call me Daddy when I didn't teach him to. Now he doesn't do any of that and calls me Mike. This all started after his dad found out that he was hanging around me. I'm also worried this could be some sort of Autism sign. He is 3 and a half years old now do you think this is some kind of disorder or that his father is filling his head with stuff? What can I do about it if he is to make him love me again?

Edited by gasman
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Just be there for him.

 

Bottom line is if there is any kind of abuse - mental, physical, sexual - for a start he needs someone to trust. Don't worry about the words he uses - calling you dad or I love you. If he plays with you, that has to be good enough for now.

 

If autism is part of the issue, that might make some sense depending on how old he is for some of the issues.

 

Crying and sensitivity - depends, I know my daughter is VERY empathetic - she can cry over mom leaving the house - at 7 yrs old! She get's it under control quickly, so it's ok.

 

Autistic kids are often very sensitive to change - sounds like there might be a lot of that - people who are/have watched him, boyfriend / dad -- arguments. Actually, ANY kid would do well with a normal consistent routine, but if you think there is autism, it is very important. Simple things like dinner time, then tub time, story time, then bed time. Consistent EVERY night.

 

Again, In my 'non-expert' opinion, I would focus on just being a positive person in his life. Try to get along with everyone else - the dad for example - if you are this person, he will naturally get closer to you. Then just keep an eye on behavior - don't try to question him, just see how he acts after spending time with dad, grandpa, etc. Look for patterns.

 

Oh, and if there is autism, often play time is a little different -- you have to learn to be OK with that -- you might not be able to play catch -- you might have to play imaginary pirate or dragons and knights.

 

Hope that helps.

 

 

==

AAIG

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