more mundane question -- babysitter

[pr40]

So, do you leave your PANDAS child/children with a baby-sitter? how do you do it?

We found it impossible. A year ago, we tried to train one that seemed mature but that did not work.

If you did it, how did you do it?

any other tricks?

 

[Agnes26]

My DD's school has student teachers every year. We've hired several as babysitters.

[rowingmom]

We never hired a babysitter - things could escalate out of control too quickly. A few times we left her with grandparents and went to a movie (I could count them on 1 hand), but usually we didn't go out together. One of us was always with DD.

 

Things are looking up - this summer we made it to 2 concerts! My fav - Depeche Mode and (you have to be Canadian to know this one) The Spoons. Yay!

[peglem]

We never hired babysitters either. When she was younger, MIL could handle babysitting, but mostly hub and I switched off. Now that her sisters are older, they have become certified to provide respite care, which is great because they absolutely will not be surprised by her!

[airial95]

I love the spoons!!! We were able to catch BNL down here in the spring. But my favorites (Moxy Fruvous and Lowest of the Low) have been broken up for a while Being from Buffalo, all we listened to was Canadian music growing up!!

 

Anyway, we leave our kids often with babysitters - helps keep our sanity. If it's going to be an all day affair (USF Football anyone?) My parents usually take them. If my folks can't, we won't typically chance a day long outing with a babysitter. Too many variables.

 

We have 3 girls from the neighborhood that have known them and watched them since birth - so they have seen my kids grow up and seen the transition in them thanks to PANDAS. That has helped a lot. We started by only leaving them with a sitter after they had gone to sleep. Yes, that meant some late dinners not leaving until way after 8:00, but that was our comfort level. And it was a win win, we got our date, and there was less worry about our kids trying to kill the babysitter.

 

Then we slowly transitioned to leaving a half hour before bed, and creeping up. Finally, last year we were able to have a sitter after school 3 days a week. She had some rough days, but she had been around the kids often enough during flares just being our next door neighbor, that she knew how to handle them for the most part.

 

We have also taken 2 of the 3 on vacation with us to help out. That 24/7 exposure also helped "train" them. Those same 2 are in college - one for her masters in speech therapy specifically for autistic children, and the other in her 2nd year of nursing school, but she has a special interest in working with children with special needs. So having them both take an interest in "special" kids is mutually beneficial. Our kids give them real "hands on" experience, and we get babysitters that are more understanding of the challenges.

 

We were lucky to have 3 in our neighborhood that have worked out well. It is also a huge help that our kids absolutely ADORE all three of them. (My 5 year old keeps asking the 24 year old when they can get married. And don't think she hasn't used that as leverage to get him to focus sometimes...)

 

I believe Care.com, the online babysitting match service, has special pairings for kids with special needs/disabilities. That might be a place to start.

[nicklemama]

We rarely have a babysitter. Early on, DS had such intense separation anxiety, it was unthinkable. Then, when he was a little better, I was too afraid to. We are having a sitter tomorrow night for the first time in ages. His best friend is coming over, the 16 yo boy next door is sitting and we are going out with his friends parents ( who are our friends too).

 

For the past four years, mostly DH and I go out separately and the other stays home with our son. Never thought my life would be like that. We don't have family anywhere near to help. We are on our own.

[qannie47]

This forum has an uncanny way of seeping into my mind and sharing my exact thoughts. WE HAVE RAN OUT OF BABYSITTERS WITH RECENT PANDAS EPISODE..NOBODY WILL RETURN OUR CALL....anyway, now that I got that out of my system...I have ran out of ideas for babysitters as well. The problem seems to be that the ones qualified charge 25 and hour.

[Mayzoo]

Our kiddo (even pre-PANDAS) and our family is complicated. We have left her with a friend of mine a few times when I have to go the doc and hubby is working. Otherwise, hubby and I have not had a "date night out" since she was born. My sister would watch her, but she has lived almost 1800 miles away since kiddo was very young.....that is a long commute for a date night LOL.

[SSS]

My DH took a week off last month while the kids were in school, and he and I did some daytime activities together

while all 3 kids were in school (finally have all of them in full day school)

We don't have much money left, so things like a walk through a gated high end housing community

admiring the architecture in the sunshine,

trip to the local Indian casino we'd never been to for lunch,

visited and walked around a new outside mall with a Whole Foods, etc.