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Wombat140 last won the day on May 16

Wombat140 had the most liked content!

About Wombat140

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  1. That is a one. Plain bizarre, as well as exhausting. Well, six year olds don't do making sense anyway and when you cross that with PANDAS... Glad if she's not sp bad with it now. Somebody on another forum suggested that it might have something to do with a traumatic event - she gave the ex\ample of someone who's in a car accident and there's a cherry air freshener in the car and thereafetr they hate the smell of cherries without necessariy even knowing why. That makes a kind of sense to me, it does seem to fit the way it behaves to suggest that it's a kind of conditioned response. But I don't know what the event would have been unless it was the OCD onset itself. That was traumatic right enough, since it was the famous out-of-a-blue-sky PANS onset and I had no idea what was going on, only that I felt as if my mind was being sucked out htrough a straw every time a car went past and that everyone was telling me that there was nothing and to stop being stupid - since they had no idea what was going on either and could only think I was just play-acting for some reason! But what the connection might have been, or where that would get you, I don't know. It seems t me that the way it works is that I mean roughly the same thing by it as most people - well, I think I do - but it's the associations that are off. When I think of that word, I think of the most creepy possible images that you could connect it to, and if I think of it applying to anything my mind immediately jumps from there to those. What do you mean by ERP? The name ERP always suggests to me being faced with the thing and held down by three strong men until the screaming stops. Well, with me it really would be a case of three strong men and also it does't seem to work; I can carry on being in a state for as long as we've ever tried it and the more efforts people are making to force me to stop, the more I/it fight back. In any case, it looks like being a while until I can get to see anyone; first I haveto see the local psychologist, who assessed me a while bac and would be making the referal, the referra, to discuss her conclusions and what's the best thing to do, and she says it's a two or three week wait just to see her. In the meantime, these wrod things are giving me the runaround and getting out of control, getting mixed up wth everything - they've become my main obsession now, in the last month or two. Can anyone make any hints about how you make friends with a thing that you've developed a horror of? I've been maing tentative fforts but it's often hard to know wher to get a foothold - how to come up with any way of seeing it as anything other than terrible, and how to get it to stick once I have. By the way, here's a thing. Yes, this is the word I'm talking about (or the maion one - I have various secondarty ones too at the moment), but please, don't say it to me for exposure's' sake, as I can't cope with that at the moment.
  2. Thank you, both of you! I was thinking it was just me, and that's never a goood feeling. And if it's commonish in PANS cases, and there are a fair amount of those about, maybe that means thetre's a chance that a psychologist I see might be aware of it. Yes, mine shapeshift something awfull, too. I suspect there are underlying psychological issues, but I also suspect that they wouldn't be doing this if some mechancial fault in my brain wasn't just convinced that something must be wrong and was just using them as inspiration for what kind of terrible thing might be happening. That mae sense, sdo you think? I should upaate my signature. I'm currently on Lyme disease. We've gone back to Amy Smith and she has me on various preliminary things to try and get me in better shape before starting on antibactieral herbs. HOPEFULLY shouldn't be long now; we've had a ludicrous amount of delays trying to get hold of the last preliminary thing! Unfortuntatrely I can't take any kind of psychoactive medications because my OCD won't let me. When I've forced myself to taethem anyway, t goes into screemaing lockdown claiming that I can't know whether it's safe to do ... pretty well anything I'm trying to do ... or whethet it's just the drugs making me think it is, and I'm practically unable to move at all until enough time has passed that I can feel sure the drug is out of my system. It's really inconveniaent beause I can't even take half the standard herbs for Lyme diseas (specifially, notweed, cat's claw, skullcap and ashwaganha), because they're supposedd to have psychoactive effects as well as pyhiscal effects. Any mors tories fro olther peple would be apprecaited, esppecially if you can say anything about how you got over it.
  3. I posted something in the OCD forum. I'm just mentionng it here in case people don't see it there. (please reply there rather than here.) Sorry if this is naughty, I just don't know how many p[eope actually look at the OCD forum, it's so quiet! https://latitudes.org/forums/topic/25056-irrational-loathing-of-something-that-others-consider-normal/
  4. I was wondering if anyone here knows about a thing that I have that I've heard about very occasionally, but it seems to be very rare - a horror of a particular thing, or in my case it's a word (see Desperately need to talk to somebody - poison words), not because I think it will cause something bad to happen but in its own right - that thing just is, in itself, a horrible thing to me. And yet it's not something that anyone else considers a problem. When I try to ask people about mine, they go "But it's a nice word". Has anyone any knowledge of this and how you go about getting over it? Does anyone know of anyne who's ever recovered from this? I'm currently pinning all my hopes on seeing a psychologist, but even when that happens, I d afraid they'll never have heard of this or know what to do about it!
  5. Hi Imy3, welcome to the forum. It's horrible, isn't it? I've had episodes of thoughts like that (,mine are usually odd ones that wouldn't make sense to anyone else, but they upset me a lot). I wish I could tell you how to wave a magic wnad and make the thoughts just go away, but it doesn't work like that. Trying to force them to go away in a hurry only makes it worse, because obviously to push something away you have to pay attention to it so if you try to attack a thought you just make it bigger; you just have to let them subside in their own time. It's like trying to sweep ripples off a pond with a broom. The more you swweep the more stirred up it gets, but if you wait a while it'll subside by itself. Take courage, it doesn't necessarliy take that long, if you can manage to be patient and not fight with them too much. Try and think about good things. I don't mean make yourself only think of good things instead of these thoughts, asI just mentioned that's not possible, I just mean try and think of good things as well. That way you can crowd them out. Or at least keep oyur spiritis up until they do subside, which also means you won't be panicking and attacking the thoughts. Reading something uplifitng, or very silly, may help. It's rather like having a illness of some kind - it's misreable but you just need to make a fuss of yourself and try and keep your spirits up and wait for the sneezing to stop. (I just thought of that.) Also, music helps a lot. I think it's lie the draught up a chimney - it keeps your thoughrs going along instead of stopping and swirling around in cicles. NO, you're not an evil person, far from it - everyone makes that mistake, naturally enough. It's often said, the fact that you were alarmed by the thoughts, whatever they are, to start with, proves that you don't like the idea. (no, that doesnt mean you need to carry on being alarmen by them to be in the right - they were a false alarm, so to spea, and you know that now.) The fact that a really nasty idea occurred to you doesn't mean you're bad, it just means you're imaginative.
  6. Incidentally, how do I tell if I'm a "5 drops only" person? The book mentiones that about 1% of people with Lyme disease are hypersensitive to all outside substances and can't tolerate more than 1-5 drops of a rememdy. How do I tell if I'm one of them? I was rather suspicious as I have a history pf bad reactions to things, so I started with 5 drops (echinacea), then as nothing mucn seems to be happening, IO went up to a full odse of 1 tsp, but there didn't seem to be any difference. I later went down to 5 drops again, because things had been rallly dire, but things contiuniued much the same i.e. bad. How do I know which is right? What is "being unable to tolerate higher doses" supposed to consist of?
  7. Hmm. I could really do with some advice, if anyone has any. The latest is: In desperation, on April 10th I started taking the milk thistle again - but I didn't get a headache and the OCD didn't budge. I'm still taking it but nothing's happening. What should I do? Can anyone think what's going on? If it was indeed that it did work the first time, why isn't it working now? I suppose it's possible that it wasd a delayed reaction to another thing, not the milk thistle at all. But then, I'm still taking all the other things I was taking at that point, plus a few new ones, so why the change? An intriguing thing is that the milk thistle seeds aren't meant to do anything for the Lyme disease directly; the point of them is to help with herx reactions caused by other things, by helping to get rid of the gunk released by killing off bacteria. So if it really was the milk thistle that helped, that seems to suggest that some of the other things WERE doins something. (The other things I was taking at the time were Echinacea angustifolia, selenium and green tea extract. I'm aware that these aren't usually considered first priority herbs, by the way. there are resons for that - my OCD won't let me take a lot of the "main" ones, so I'm just taking whatever relevant herbs IO can. And I haven't dared take any directly antibacterial ones yet because I'm in such a bad way I didn't dare take the risk of a herx.) Any help would be much appreciated. I really am despearate for help for help, and the milk thistle is the only thing that I've treid since I started with the herbal things in early March that does seem to have actually made things better! In general, it's just gone slowly downhill since Istarted on the herbal treatments.
  8. But if that does the opposite of what milk thistle does (at least, you seem to think taht milk thistle does the opposite of what I should be doing), then would that make my OCD worse? The trouble is, I'd sooner have migraines than OCD! Anyone else - is there anything else that might do the same job as mlik thistle without being it?
  9. PLEASE READ - Important: please read this posting before replying to anything I post: http://latitudes.org/forums/index.php?showtopic=24834#entry186170 I've been taking milk thistle - or trying to - as part of a Lyme disease protocol, or rather as a precatuin against the possible effects of a Lyme disease rotocal. I took it for a week and within a few days I started having headaches all the time, ending with what was unmistakably one of my old familiar migraines, feeling sick and everything, though I fell asleep before I got as far as actually being sick. I didn't take the milk thistle that evening (not becaude I was suspicious but jsut because I couldn't face taking it!) Headache had gone by nect day. I didn't start the milk thistle again, and the headache didn't come back. Since then, I've tried it twice, leaving a few days in between, and each time the headache has come back within a few hours. My question is, is this some kind of detoxification reaction and will go, or am I just allergic to milk thistle? I didn't think milk thistle was supposed to have a=an effct over such a short time anyway, I swa eome say that it took about a month for the liver enzmye readings to get back t narmol if they'd been up before you started taking it. The annyoing thing is that it did seem a bit better, OCD wise, while I was taking it. I'm not allericg to ragowrt pollen. I do have CBS +/-.
  10. For the information of anyone else: I found one! www.bristolbotanicals.co.uk They stock EVERYTHING (well, pretty close). Apparently people have asked them about this and they started stocking some of the herbs that had previously been missing, specially for that. Very good to deal with, too, quick and efficient and answer e-mail inquiries very fast.
  11. You're a star, LLM. You and Rowingmom both. I've e-mailed both of those people and hopefully they'll be able to tell me where they get their supplies! Good idea about Canada too, I wouldn't have thought of that.
  12. PLEASE READ - Important: please read this posting before replying to anything I post: http://latitudes.org/forums/index.php?showtopic=24834#entry186170 Hello, just wondering whether anyone happens to know a supplier for Buhner herbs in the UK or elsewhere in Europe? The book only lists American suppliers - some of them do ship to the UK but it looks like the shipping costs can be a bit steep and possibly slow as well, so it would be handy to be able to get them from closer to home. (The book suggests just doing a Web search for the names of herbs and seeing who's cheapest. I am certainly not doing that with herbs! I was reading only the other day about a woman who bought comfrey tea off a market stall and ended up in hospital, it turned out to be foxgloves.)
  13. Do the detox things make things worse before they get better?
  14. Thank you all for being so understanding! Yes, I'll definitely put a note on any new hreads, I was thinking of doing that. And thanks Sheila for editing those posts. What you say all makes a lot of sense. Don't know what I'd do without you! I've ordered the Buhner book too, you'd expect that to have something to say about it. I'll have something to discuss with my doctor now - hope he gets the point. By the way, I tested positive for something!!!! Or sort of positive. Positive on one Lyme disease test (Elispot) and negative on the other (Western Blot, I think, haven't got the results sheet handy at the moment - I do remember it had ten bands and only one showed anything), positive on Coxsackie virus, negative on the others. I don't know... is that maybe just normal and what anyone would randomly have and has nothing to do with anything? :-( maybe not, I hope. Can anyone comment?
  15. PS: In fact, LLM, could you remove the "calming inflammation" sentence in yours, too? It wouldn't wouldn't normally even be a problem, but I had such a catastrophic reaction to Ryan's posting that it's somehow got itself attached to, that particular example of it, got itself attached to he memory and is going off like a bomb every time I see it.